


I kiss you, you're beautiful

by brianmaybrianmay



Category: Duran Duran
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Girlfriends/No Wives, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Bottom John, Drug Use, Drunk Sex, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings, One Night Stands, Top Simon, notorious era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 15:20:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 34,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29316219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brianmaybrianmay/pseuds/brianmaybrianmay
Summary: The first thing John realised upon waking up - other than the headache and the churning feeling in his stomach - was the warm weight of an arm draped over his waist. Glancing over his shoulder, he felt his heart jump into his throat at the realisation that he had not only gone to bed with a man last night, but that that man was Simon. He was no stranger to bad decisions, but he was pretty sure that drunkenly hooking up with the lead singer of their band was a very bad decision.
Relationships: Simon Le Bon/John Taylor (Duran Duran)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 12





	I kiss you, you're beautiful

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much for reading this! set during 1986, so just go ahead and picture this :) 
> 
> https://64.media.tumblr.com/556848f3c02589b3470c880dc51944dc/tumblr_nyhcanaiJD1saxjmio1_500.jpg
> 
> as always, none of it's real, didn't happen, but please enjoy anyway!!

The first thing John realised upon waking up - other than the headache and the churning feeling in his stomach - was the warm weight of an arm draped over his waist. 

He had to admit though, it wasn't that unusual for him to need a moment when he woke up to remember who he'd gone to bed with, and so he didn't feel that momentary panic that he'd experienced the first couple of times that he had drunkenly hooked up with somebody. Even blind drunk, the details of the night hazy from a cocktail of alcohol and drugs, he had always been responsible when it came to one night stands. He'd so far managed to avoid any impromptu visits from a girl he'd slept with in the past, claiming that she was pregnant with his baby - and he had every intention of keeping it that way. 

With the release of _Notorious_ came the release party, and it had been.. well, exactly what he'd expected from a Duran release party. 

Well, not so much, actually.

The alcohol had still flowed freely, and it hadn't been any more difficult than usual to scrounge up drugs when the itch arose, but the most notable difference had been the absence of Roger and Andy. He knew that Simon and Nick were both feeling their absence too, but it had become a silent agreement between the three of them not to dwell on it. He understood their respective decisions to leave the band, but it didn't mean that he had to like it. They had Warren and Steve now in their places, and while it wasn't the same? They did a good job.

Still, they had managed to get the album finished, and he was proud of the record that they had put out. If he was being honest though, he really wasn't sure how the record was going to be received by the public. It was different, there was no denying that, and he knew that the label had been less than impressed with them when they had showed them the finished album - 'too urban' they had said. Still, recording had been messy, and with having three different guitarists lending their work to the album, he honestly couldn't say for certain which guitarist had ended up recording which songs. Despite everything though, they had gotten the album out, and had proved that they could function as a three piece band with stand in musicians to help them record the parts they needed. 

Turning his attention back to the present moment, he smiled when he realised that his bed mate was idly trailing their fingers along the ladder of his bare ribcage, the light touch making him squirm slightly against the ticklish feeling. 

"Morning." He said softly, reaching down to lace his fingers through the other person's. Mornings after could be stilted and awkward - and he'd had his fair few share of those awkward mornings - but he figured that it didn't have to be like that. Personally, he was of the opinion that any morning after awkwardness could be handled with a round of morning sex.

It was only when his own fingers touched the hand that was laying on his waist did he freeze - because it wasn't the small delicate hand of a woman like he had expected. It was larger, fingers a little more calloused than he'd been expecting, and he could feel the light dusting of hair along the bone of their wrist. Shit, alright, he'd never taken a man to bed before - even in all of his years of alcohol induced one night stands - so this was certainly new. 

Glancing over his shoulder, he felt his heart jump into his throat at the realisation that he had not only gone to bed with a man last night, but that that man was Simon. 

_Fuck._

He was no stranger to bad decisions, but he was pretty sure that drunkenly hooking up with the lead singer of their band was a very bad decision. 

"John, loo-" 

"Charley, _what the fuck?_ " He asked as he pushed himself into a sitting position, interrupting Simon before he could get out whatever it was that he wanted to say. 

"I don't know, mate. I woke up in same position as you." Simon insisted, drawing back now that John had moved away from him.

He couldn't help but think that that wasn't exactly true. Simon had woken up before him, it would have been all too easy for him to sneak out before John had woken up and to pretend that the whole thing hadn't happened. Instead, he'd chosen to curl up with him until he did wake up, idly tracing patterns into his bare skin. Part of him had to remind himself that Simon was a good person, that he probably thought sticking around to talk about this was the best course of action, but that required actually talking about it - which he'd never been too fond of doing. 

"Hardly." He insisted, pulling the sheet up a little more securely around himself in an attempt to retain a shred of modesty, "How long have you been awake?" 

"Not long, couple of minutes." 

He dragged a hand through his hair, cringing for a moment at the way it was matted together. It only ever really got that bad after a night of heavy drinking and a roll in the sheets, and he mentally decided that a shower would be his first move once he got himself out of this situation. A quick glance around told him that that might be a little more difficult than he had anticipated, though, considering they were in his own hotel room rather than Simon's. 

Simon sighed, turning over onto his back as he ran a hand through his own hair. From this angle, he could see the dark hickeys littered just underneath the curve of Simon's jaw and down the tendon of his neck, and he balked at the realisation that he'd left them there. Fuck, he didn't even _remember_. 

He must have physically reacted without realising it, as Simon glanced back over in his direction after a moment, "Do you want me to leave?" 

"No, I'll.. I'm going to go for a walk." He told him, glancing around for his boxers - which had thankfully only been discarded over the edge of the bed. He knew that running away from this conversation was the cowardly way out, but.. he couldn't deal with this right now. He figured a walk would help with the hangover, at least, which he'd been painfully aware of ever since he'd woken up. 

"Johnny." Simon's fingers on his wrist stilled his movements, and he glanced back over his shoulder at him again, "This.. we're okay, yeah?" 

"Yeah. Course, yeah. We just.. I just need to go clear my head." 

Thankfully, Simon let him go then, and he managed to pull his boxers on before climbing out of the bed to retrieve the rest of his clothes. He had obviously brought other clothes with him, and his bag was only sitting in the corner of the hotel room, but he didn't want to have to start scrounging through his bag right now - he'd just pull on the clothes from last night and change later once Simon had gone. Of course, that meant struggling back into his satin shirt and leather trousers that he had worn to the party last night. Minor price to pay, though. He did rummage in his bag for his glasses though, because he was already nursing a headache and the idea of putting his contact lenses in wasn't something he wanted to face right now.

"I'll see you later, Charley, I ju-" 

"I know, it's fine." 

He tried his best not to notice the flat tone to Simon's voice, but what exactly was he supposed to do? He could already feel the anxiety curling in his stomach, and the only thing he wanted to do was get out of this situation until he felt he could handle it a little better. Maybe it wasn't exactly fair, because it wasn't like Simon was doing anything other than letting him go, but he felt a little bit like the walls were starting to close in on him.

Rather than attempting to provide any more assurances - which he knew would only fall flat - he simply nodded as he pulled his boots back on, letting himself out of the hotel room once he had them on. 

Leaning against the wall just outside the door, he breathed a sigh of relief at finally getting a second to himself. They could figure this out later, but he just.. he couldn't be in that room right now. He didn't know what the hell he was supposed to say to Simon to even attempt to clear the air between them - and certainly not while they were both still naked and in bed together.

His box of cigarettes and lighter were thankfully still in his trouser pocket, and so he decided he'd go for a stroll around the hotel gardens - get a bit of fresh air as well as a nicotine fix. 

His first stop though was coffee, and so he made a quick detour to the hotel lobby on his way down to the garden so he could grab himself a cup, before stepping outside. Rather than actually going for a walk like he had planned, he simply settled down on one of the benches in the corner of the courtyard, pulling his knees up to his chest on the bench while he lit a cigarette. Thankfully, the hotel was small enough that there weren't people everywhere, plus it was still early enough that most of the guests were probably still in bed. Hell, he probably would have been too if he hadn't woken up to find himself in bed with Simon.

Fuck, he still couldn't quite wrap his head around what the fuck he'd been thinking last night. Simon was one of his best friends, and he genuinely did love him. Then there was the fan-service - the flirting on stage, the draping themselves all over each other and up against each other, the playful kisses Simon planted on him from time to time - but he just.. he'd never once imagined that there could be something more than all of that between them. 

Shit, he'd never wanted more than what they already had. 

He closed his eyes as he exhaled the smoke from his cigarette, reaching down for his coffee. It was barely after nine in the morning, and he couldn't help but wish that the coffee was something a little stronger - despite the hangover that he was still nursing. Whatever, he was chalking it up to the stress of this morning's events. He'd never been good at actually dealing with things, he much preferred to turn a blind eye towards the issue until it eventually went away. 

The night was starting to come back to him in bits and pieces now that he had had a second to think about it, and he berated himself again for having been so fucking stupid.

He remembered how fucking hot the club had been, how the already warm room had only been intensified by the amount of people in attendance. 

_He grinned as he drained back the last of his vodka, a laugh bubbling up in his throat as the girl next to him draped her arms around his neck. Chloe, he was pretty sure her name was. Or Carmen.. something with a C anyway._

_"Drink?" She asked with a grin of her own, holding her glass up to his lips._

_He took the required sip, before draping an arm over her shoulders, "How about something stronger?" He suggested, glancing back towards the back of the club. Like he'd said before, it was never too difficult to get hold of some sort of drug at nights like this, and cocaine being his drug of choice meant that he barely had to go go any effort at all._

_"Yeah, alright." She agreed, letting him take her by the hand and lead her back to a couple of people that had offered him a bump of coke earlier._

_It was too easy, really. Girls, drugs.. ten years ago, he never would have imagined that by now, he'd barely have to ask to get whatever he wanted handed to him on a silver plate. Obviously things hadn't always been smooth sailing, and lately it had felt a little like the Duran Duran star was on it's descent. He was trying not to be despondent about it though, which was where the booze and the drugs kicked in._

_He dropped down onto the couch between two other people, letting Chloe-Carmel-Whatever make herself comfortable on his lap while the guy next to him on the couch cut them a couple of white lines on the mirrored table._

_It had always been easier before, back when Andy was still part of the band. The other three members of the band had never had a thing for drugs the way he did, but Andy had always been his partner in crime. It was easy with somebody there at his side, but not having that hadn't stopped him either._

_He let Chloe lean forward to do the first line, taking the rolled up five pound note once she had finished so that he could follow with a line of his own. Holding his nose for a moment once he had done the line, he slouched back onto the couch with a grin on his face. Fuck, it really was easy to forget all of the shit that was going on when he was on this buzz._

_"Johnny."_

_He was distracted from whatever Carmel had been saying to him by Simon appearing by the couch, his own cheeks flushed from both the heat of the room and the alcohol that he had consumed._

_"Charley." He beamed, shuffling over slightly on the couch to make room between himself and the guy beside him, "Come and sit with me."_

_To his delight, Simon did what he was asked and dropped down to sit next to him. The couch really wasn't big enough for five people - even with Chloe sat on his lap - but he didn't mind the way they were all pressed tight against each other, "D'you want a bump?" He asked, shifting around a little so that he could drape his free arm around Simon._

_"No, mate, come get a drink." Simon insisted with a smile, tugging on his arm as he rose to his feet again. He knew that Simon had never wholeheartedly approved of his coke habit, but aside from a song that he had slipped under his door a couple of years ago, he had never explicitly voiced his displeasure at it either. He'd take what he could._

_He deposited Catherine on the couch with a murmur of 'back in a minute, love' as he stood up, following Simon back up to the bar. Once there, he leaned back against the bar as Simon got them a drink each, nodding his head with the rhythm as the first notes of Meet El Presidente began playing._

_"So, who's your lady friend?" Simon asked as he turned back to him, grin on his face as he passed him his drink._

_"Uh, Carol. Chloe-" Simon laughed. "-I don't know. I missed it, it's very loud in here." He admitted. He was pretty sure any involvement with her wouldn't last any longer than tonight anyway, so he didn't feel too badly about not catching her name. He pushed a hand up through his hair, closing his eyes for a moment against the humid air of the club, "Smoke break?" He suggested. His hair was damp at the back of his neck, and he could feel the satin of his shirt sticking to the small of his back._

_"Yeah, alright."_

_They walked out and around to the side entrance of the club, both of them leaning back against the wall of the club. He felt a little bit like he could breathe now that it was just the two of them, and he glanced over at Simon with a smile as he watched the older man lighting his own cigarette, "Where's Nick?" He asked._

_"Last I saw, he was with Warren. Entertaining party goers, you know how he is." Simon said with a grin in return. Even though it was just the three of them now, he knew that neither of them felt as though they had to babysit Nick when they needed to take a moment._

_He lit his own cigarette once they had lapsed back into silence, glancing back at Simon once he nudged his elbow with his own, "Hey, Johnny." He started, "I know this album i-"_

_"Hey, it's good." He interrupted. He'd stand by that until the day that he died. This time last year they had been so divided - with himself and Andy working on The Power Station, and the remaining three members busy with Arcadia - and Live Aid hadn't been a pleasant show for anyone involved. Now that he, Simon, and Nick were all on the same team again, he wouldn't have changed that for the world. He was proud of Notorious, even though getting the studio to even release the album had been a labour of love._

_"I mean it." He continued, when Simon just raised an eyebrow in his direction, "I know we had a shit time getting here, but we did it. The album is done, and it's good. It's different, but it's good." He insisted. He didn't want Simon to be too despondent - they had worked their arses off, and now they just had to take whatever the critics and the public said about the album. The three of them were pleased with the result, and so that was all that mattered._

_Simon smiled, reaching over to nudge the back of his hand against his. He caught it though, lacing their fingers together and giving his hand a squeeze, "You think so?" Simon asked after a moment, leaning in to his side when he let go of his hand to drape it around Simon's waist instead._

_"Yeah, I do."_

_Honestly, he did. He believed every word of what he'd just said. Obviously it was hard to hear when even the label had said they didn't want to put the record out, but they had persevered and had gotten out the other end in one piece. It would have been easy to write his words off as him being both drunk and high, but they seemed to reassure Simon a little. Then again, he was just as drunk._

_Simon only smiled and nodded, before leaning up to give him a playful peck on the lips. It was nothing that they hadn't done before, and so he didn't think twice about pressing back in to it for a moment with a smile on his own lips._

_His arm around Simon's waist kept him from going far though, and he huffed out a breath of laughter as Simon bumped their noses together with a quiet laugh of his own._

_He wasn't sure which one of them leaned back in, but before he knew it, their lips were pressed together in another kiss. It was.. different, though. It wasn't the playful peck that the last kiss had been, and he could feel the smile sliding off his face as their mouths moved together._

_His arm was still wrapped around Simon's waist, cigarette burning out in his other hand. He was pretty sure that Simon was still holding his own cigarette too, although he brought his free hand up after a moment to wind it into John's hair, angling his head a little better into the kiss._

_What had started off as a harmless kiss that had become such a common occurrence between them had suddenly escalated into something else altogether - their tongues in each others mouths, him dropping the remainder of his cigarette so that he could wind his other arm around Simon too. He barely realised that he had dragged him closer - and that Simon had brought his other hand up too so that he was cupping his head between his hands - until he pulled away with a gasp of breath at the sound of a door shutting around the other side of the club._

_"We can't." He gasped, fingers pressing in where they gripped onto Simon's waist, "Not here, I-" He trailed off, swallowing thickly as Simon brushed their lips together again. He wasn't sure if was the adrenaline rush, or the fact that he was drunk, or if it was something different altogether, but he found himself leaning in to it again, "I'm going to go back to my room."_

_Simon nodded, his eyes heavy as he regarded John for a moment, "Alright, yeah. For the best."_

_"Come with me."_

_"Yeah?"_

_"Yeah."_

_Maybe it was a mistake, but with Simon's hands in his hair and his tongue in his mouth, he was finding it very hard to feel anything other than want. The fact that he'd never thought about Simon in this way before tonight was a minor detail._

_Simon just looked at him for a moment longer - seemingly debating with himself over whether this was a bad idea or not - as he gently brushed his fringe back from his face. When he leaned into the touch though, his eyes sliding shut, it seemed to be enough to make up Simon's mind for him, "Alright. I'll follow you up, I left my jacket inside."_

_Part of him was relieved at that, since it would at least give him a couple of minutes to attempt to get his head on straight. Or to get another line of coke in, he knew he had some in his bag upstairs._

_The hotel was only across the road from the club, so it was thankfully only a matter of minutes before he was letting himself into his room, leaning back against the wall for a moment once he'd shut the door behind himself. Okay, first order of business, he crouched next to his bag to rummage through it until he found the bag of coke in the inside pocket, pulling his wallet out of his back pocket so that he could cut the line with one of his cards. By now, he was an old hand at this. Years of drunkenly cutting lines with Andy in club bathrooms while barely coherent had prepared him for this, and so it only took him a couple of seconds to kneel at the glass table and quickly cut himself a line. Like he'd said before, he knew Simon didn't exactly approve of his drug habit, and so he wanted to get it out of the way before he showed up._

_Once he had done the line, he quickly brushed away the residue left on the table before crossing the room to pour them both a drink. He was just pouring them both a glass of gin from the mini-bar when there was a knock on the door, and he trailed back over to let Simon in._

_"Alright?" He said with a grin, holding up the glass of gin as he stepped aside to let him in, "Drink?"_

_"Yeah, thanks."_

_They were both quiet as they trailed over to the couch dropping down on either end of it, and he couldn't help but notice the anxious manner in which Simon chewed at his lower lip._

_Outside the club, the rush of adrenaline that came from kissing Simon, as well as the possibility of being caught had had him not thinking twice before asking him to come back up to his hotel room with him, but now that they were here? Now that they had had a second to stop and think about what they were actually doing? He couldn't help but wonder if this whole thing was a stupid idea._

_Still, they were both hazy from the alcohol, he'd been halfway to hard ever since Simon had first dipped his tongue into his mouth, and fuck.. he really couldn't deny how good the other man smelled._

_"Johnny.." He murmured, although he couldn't help but notice the way his eyes dropped to his mouth for a split second, "We d-"_

_Making up his mind, he leaned over to close the distance between them, dropping his free hand to Simon's thigh as he pressed their lips together again. Thankfully, Simon didn't shove him away and insist that he hadn't come here for that, but he was also slightly surprised at how quickly he responded. He pushed forward into the kiss a little as Simon slid his hand back up into his hair, moving them back until Simon was lying back against the armrest and he was hovering over him._

_"Wait, hold on." He murmured against his mouth, doing his best not to splash any of the liquor out of his glass as he shifted around slightly in an attempt to get more comfortable - so he wasn't just kneeling over Simon._

_"Fuck.. give me that, you're getting me all wet." Simon insisted, taking the glass from him and twisting around slightly to deposit both of their glasses on the table. Probably for the best, he was one hundred percent going to end up spilling them if he tried to keep up this balancing act._

_He let Simon coax him back down into another kiss once he had moved their glasses out of the way, settling down a little more comfortably on top of him. Well, as comfortably as he could, considering the tiny couch wasn't exactly made for two men who were both taller than six foot. He attempted to stretch out a little, unable to quite keep the grin off his face when Simon laughed against his lips, "What?" He asked, trailing his mouth down over the curve of Simon's jaw._

_"You. You're all boney."_

_"It's this fucking couch."_

_"And nothing at all to do with your boney limbs? You're like a baby giraffe."_

_"Fuck off, we're the same height."_

_He attempted to shuffle around again, although a laugh of his own slipped out when he accidentally dug his knee into Simon's thigh, "Alright, hold on." He huffed, dragging himself back up off the couch. He pulled Simon up by the hands, although he didn't let him go far, cupping his face between his hands as he pulled him in for another kiss, walking him back towards the bed._

_A surprised moan slipped out when Simon slid his hands down his waist to grip his arse, and he couldn't help the way his own hands drifted down from his face to the front of his shirt, wrestling with the top couple of buttons, "Get this off." He breathed as he followed the trail his hands had made with his mouth, darting his tongue out to taste the salt in the hollow of Simon's throat._

_Surprisingly, it didn't take him too long to get the rest of the buttons undone, and he pushed the shirt down off Simon's shoulders, tossing it to the floor once he had pulled it off all the way. Rather than doing the same though, Simon simply took his shirt by the hem and pulled it up over his head rather than attempting to undo the buttons. Laughing under his breath, he reached up to smooth John's hair back down once he had pulled the shirt off. He leaned into the touch with a grin, leaning in for a moment to brush their lips together with a quick flick of his tongue, before pushing Simon down onto the bed once his calves had hit the frame._

_Fuck.. he knew that they had both had their reservations when Simon had first shown up, but now he couldn't even attempt to deny the want curling in his stomach as he looked down at the older man. He could tell that Simon was feeling the same, the flush high on his cheeks as he settled against the pillow._

_"Take your jeans off." He breathed as he kneeled on the bed with one knee, the other foot still on the floor._

_Simon didn't need to be asked twice, teeth sinking into his lower lip as he reached down to undo his belt, pulling it loose before undoing the button and zipper on his jeans. Fuck, he had planned to just watch, to let Simon strip himself out of his jeans, but he was moving without even realising it, crawling up the bed to meet him._

_"Killing me, Charley." He said with a grin, a knee either side of Simon's hips as he leaned back to undo his own jeans._

_It felt a little like the urgency had kicked up after that - pulling at the remainder of each others clothes as they stripped each other, hands sliding into hair, panting against each others feverish skin._

_He kicked his boxers to the end of the bed as Simon rolled them over, holding John's jaw steady as he pressed their lips together in a fierce kiss. Fuck, he'd only ever slept with women before this, he'd never had the experience of feeling like he was being devoured. Simon certainly wasn't some delicate waif who laid placidly and let John take the reins, though. He was giving as good as he got, and it was completely different than to what John was used to. On that note though, the fact remained that he had never been with a man before this. Sex with a girl was easy and straightforward, sex with a man was.. well, he had to admit that he was a little out of his depth._

_"Charley.. Simon." He gasped as Simon trailed his mouth down to his neck, an honest to God whimper slipping out when he sucked hard at the tendon. Shit, he was pretty sure that would end up leaving a mark, "Charley, I've never.."_

_"Neither have I." Simon murmured against his neck, littering soft kisses up the length of his neck until he reached his mouth again._

_He lost himself in the kiss for a moment, sliding his fingers up into Simon's hair as the older man stripped off his boxers too and tossed them out of the way. God, he'd never imagined that tonight would end with him naked in bed with Simon - and yet, here they were. Whatever reservations either of them had had at the beginning were well and truly lost now. All he could think about was the press of Simon's hips against his own, how good his mouth felt on his skin._

_"What do we do?" He asked, attempting at least a little bit of rational thought - just enough to actually get them somewhere._

_In lieu of an answer, Simon simply reached down to wrap his fingers around his cock, huffing softly against his neck as he dropped his head back down, "Is this okay?"_

_"Yeah.. fuck." He gasped, his hand shaking as he reached down to return the favour. It was an unusual sensation, the feeling of having a hand on a cock that wasn't his own. Still, he couldn't deny that the low moan Simon gave in return had the heat curling in his stomach again. He leaned up to kiss him again, relishing in the way that Simon cupped his jaw in his free hand as he opened up to the kiss. He couldn't help but moan into the kiss as Simon slowly stroked his cock, grip just tight enough to have his hips bucking forward into it, "Please, Simon."_

_"I've got you, Johnny, hold on."_

_Rather than just bringing each other to the edge like that, Simon managed to roll them over again so they were both lying on their sides, legs tangled together. He was glad for the change in position, if he was being honest. Simon's weight on top of him had felt good in ways he wasn't even going to attempt to decipher right now, but lying facing each other like this gave them both a little more room to work with._

_"You feel so good, Johnny. So fucking beautiful." Simon gasped, and he couldn't do much more than pant against his mouth in response as they worked each other._

_As Simon arched his neck back with a moan, he couldn't resist leaning forward to press his mouth to the expanse of skin, flicking his tongue over the pulse point just under the curve of his jaw, "Come on, Charley." He breathed as he scraped his teeth over the tender skin, sucking hard for a moment before soothing the mark with his tongue._

_He focused his attention on Simon's neck while he slowly stroked his cock, littering the length of his neck with tender bruises. Maybe it was a bad idea to leave physical evidence of tonight, but nobody had to know that it was him who had put them there. If makeup wouldn't cover it, Simon could simply say that he'd gotten lucky with a girl he'd picked up at the party._

_Eventually though, Simon tugged him up by the hair to press their lips together again - although he couldn't quite help the moan that slipped out at the brief manhandling. He had a lot of hair, he wasn't averse to it being pulled. After a moment though, it seemed neither of them were capable of anything more than panting against each others' mouths as they each quickened the pace of their hands, "Fuck, I'm so close." He whined, closing his eyes as he knocked his forehead against Simon's, feeling like his entire body was curling in towards Simon's touch._

_"I know.. come on, you can let go." Simon groaned, his own hips bucking forward._

_All it took was Simon attempting to kiss him again - his tongue flicking momentarily into his mouth - and a quick twist of his wrist at the head of his cock, before he was coming. He could hear the hoarse moan that spilled out of him as his eyes squeezed shut, feel the shudders that wracked his body, but he could hardly focus on anything other than the pleasure that ripped through him as his orgasm washed over him._

_Briefly, he vaguely registered Simon succumbing to his own orgasm, but he was too busy trying to keep his vision from totally whiting out at the edges that he couldn't do much more than reach out to stroke his hand over Simon's cheek, sliding his fingers up into his hair._

_After what could have been either thirty seconds or an hour, he turned his head towards Simon again, smiling as he gently knocked their foreheads together. His eyes were closed, but he could still feel the huff of breath as the older man struggled to catch his breath - much the same as he was._

_"Fuck." He eventually breathed, unable to quite hold back the breath of laughter. He opened his eyes to find Simon already watching him, flush still high on his cheeks, affection clear in his eyes. At that, he couldn't resist closing the distance between them to press their lips together in another soft kiss. By all standards, the kiss was chaste compared to their previous kisses, but it still felt like more than their typical quick pecks that Simon was so fond of giving him._

_"That sums it up, alright." Simon murmured with a grin as they separated, settling against the pillow._

_Now that the urgency and the lust had passed, he could feel the exhaustion starting to push through - probably only heightened by the alcohol in his system as well as the mind-blowing orgasm he had just had. The sheets had been pulled haphazardly across the bed, and so he pulled them up around them as well as he could manage, feebly attempting to clean them both off a little with the corner of the sheet, before settling with his head tucked into the crook of Simon's neck. Maybe they'd regret this in the morning, maybe this whole thing had been a huge fucking mistake. But right now, he was warm and comfortable, and Simon was gently trailing his fingers along the bare skin of his shoulder, "Stay, it's late."_

_"You sure?"_

_"Yeah, stay." He murmured._

_Simon only hesitated for a moment before draping his arm a little more securely around his shoulders, pressing a quick kiss to his forehead as he settled down, "Goodnight, love."_

He sighed as he ran his free hand through his hair, flicking the ash from his cigarette into the ashtray on the end of the bench.

Fuck, how could he have been so stupid? He found that he still didn't have an answer for that particular question, despite having already asked himself multiple times that morning. Sure, he'd been drunk last night - they both had, plus he'd been high as a fucking kite on top of that - but he wasn't sure how he'd ever imagined that sleeping with Simon would be a good decision. 

They were already struggling. They had only just managed to get this album out, they had lost Roger and Andy.. they didn't need this development causing another rift between them when they had only just gotten their shit together - especially mere weeks before a tour.

He tried his best to ignore the tiny voice in the back of his head that reminded him of just how good they had been in bed together, how he had reveled in the affection from Simon, because that certainly wasn't what he wanted. Like he'd said before; they played it up on stage for the fans, they had never been shy of a little PDA with each other, but it had never gone as far as it had last night. 

Fuck, he didn't know how he was supposed to face Simon after this. 

Aside from a couple of smaller local shows in the near future, they had a little bit of time off now before the _Strange Behaviour_ tour was to commence, but they still had to be able to face each other. They couldn't afford to fuck this up. 

He glanced up when the spot next to him on the bench was suddenly occupied, surprised to find Nick at his side. Unsurprisingly though, the younger man was already dressed sharply, makeup subtle but impeccable, not a hair out of place. He was sure he looked quite a sight next to him - hair a birds mess of tangles, still dressed in his clothes from last night. 

"Good morning, sunshine." Nick greeted with a nod as he lit his own cigarette. 

He simply hummed in response, taking a mouthful from his coffee. 

"You left at an uncharacteristically early time last night." Nick pointed out with a raised eyebrow, although he laughed quietly after a moment, "I take it you received a better option than the girl you were with in the club?" He asked, with a pointed nod towards John's neck. 

His hand flew up to his throat, balking at the dull pain he felt. _Fuck_ , Simon must have left him with a hickey or two of his own. He hadn't even realised, he hadn't exactly stopped to admire his reflection before taking off. 

"Oh, dear. One of those nights?" Nick asked with a soft breath of laughter, obviously picking up on the shock that had crossed his face. 

He swallowed thickly, hands shaking as he attempted to light himself another cigarette. Of course though, the light wouldn't catch, and he tossed the cigarette with a sigh of frustration, "I fucked up, Nicky." He muttered. 

"Go on?" 

He sighed again, toying with the box of cigarettes as he debated whether or not to attempt lighting another one. Fuck, he wanted a drink, he didn't want to sit here and have this conversation. 

"John, did something happen last night?" Nick prompted, his voice laced with concern. He got it, though. He'd be concerned too if their positions were reversed, if Nick had been the one acting as sketchy as he knew he currently was.

"Simon and I slept together." 

He could tell that he'd surprised Nick with that information, but he half wished that he would say something rather than sitting in stunned silence. Still, the other half of him was almost afraid of what he was going to say when he eventually did speak up. 

"Could you say something?" He eventually asked, chewing nervously at his lower lip. If Nick was going to berate him for the stupid decisions he'd made last night, he'd rather just get it out of the way. Fuck, why had he said anything at all? It was going to be difficult enough trying to move past the awkwardness with Simon without having Nick be angry at them both too. Still, he supposed it was a small blessing that they hadn't been in the middle of recording the album. 

"What d'you want me to say?" Nick asked. 

"I don't know, just.. tell me this won't fuck everything up." 

"Have you spoken to Simon this morning?" 

"Sort of." He admitted, "He was already awake when I woke up. I sort of panicked and took off." 

Nick sighed, reaching over to grip his free hand and squeeze it. Secretly, he was actually rather relieved. He knew that last night had the potential to ruin everything that they had worked so hard for, and so he was glad that Nick at least didn't seem to be angry with him.

"Look." Nick started, "It's up to you and Simon to fix this. It's not the end of the world - nobody's pregnant, nobody died, just.. figure it out, alright?"

He nodded, gently squeezing Nick's hand in return. He knew that they had to try and sort this out, for the sake of the band if nothing else, but he just.. he didn't even know where to begin, "Fuck, I could use a drink." He admitted with a shaky laugh, tugging a hand through his hair again. He hoped that Simon hadn't hung around in his room, because he was in desperate need of a shower and some toothpaste. 

"You _already_ have a hangover." Nick reminded him, "What you need is breakfast and a shower."

He couldn't quite argue there, despite the fact that he would still appreciate a drink if it was handed to him. 

Nick rose to his feet again then, bending to press a quick kiss to his hair, "Sort it out." He told him. He appreciated having Nick around, he had always looked after him despite the fact that he was two years younger. He supposed it probably came from their early days in the band - Nick had always been the more confident of the two, already comfortable in makeup and colourful clothes, whereas he had still been painfully shy, hiding behind his glasses and heavy fringe. 

"Yeah.. thanks, Nicky." He said with a small smile, watching him go. He sighed once he had gone back inside, allowing himself one more cigarette before he told himself he'd go back up to his room and face Simon if he was still there. 

  
-x-

  
Thankfully, Simon had made himself scarce by the time he'd gotten back to his hotel room. He knew that he'd have to face him eventually, but he just.. he wanted to at least be presentable when he did - he knew he smelled of alcohol and sweat, and last night's clothes weren't helping in the slightest. 

Besides, he was pretty sure a shower would help him feel a little bit better. 

He didn't spend too long in the shower - just long enough to attempt to untangle the birds nest that his hair currently was, and to wash away the stale feeling of the hangover. As he scrubbed himself though, he was a little horrified to realise that they obviously hadn't done a stellar job of cleaning themselves up last night either. Dried come was never a pleasant thing to have to deal with. 

As he rinsed himself off though, eyes closed as he leaned back underneath the spray to rinse his hair, he couldn't help but let his mind wander. Last night had been.. well, fuck. He and Simon had been good together. Obviously he'd panicked when he'd woken up to find Simon curled around him, but he couldn't deny that the sex last night had been nothing but great. Still, it wasn't like that. Simon was a good looking bloke, obviously, and apparently they had the chemistry where it counted, but he just.. it was never even a thought that had crossed his mind before last night. 

He quickly dressed once he was out of the shower, pulling on a loose fitting shirt and a pair of jeans. They didn't really have any plans for today other than driving back up to Birmingham, and so there was no need to get dolled up. It hadn't stopped Nick, obviously, but he had always been like that. As he brushed his teeth once he had mostly towel dried his hair, he was painfully aware of the bag of coke that he'd shoved back in to the side pocket of his bag before Simon had showed up last night. Realistically, he knew that the hangovers were always worse when combined with the comedown from the night before, but it hadn't stopped him so far. 

On that note, he figured one bump to start the day off wouldn't be the worst idea. Usually he wouldn't, this early in the morning, but he knew it was going to be a trying day as it was - with having to face Simon at some point. So fuck it, what was the harm? 

Just as it hadn't taken him long last night, it hadn't taken him any longer this morning to quickly cut himself a line and snort it off the glass tabletop. That would do him for the day, just enough to get him through whatever the fuck today had in store for them. It only became a problem when he felt that he couldn't function without it. He could, he very easily could have chosen not to take anything - he just felt like it would ease the day a little. 

He sighed as he closed his eyes, leaning back against the armrest of the table as he waited for the effects of the drug to kick in. Alright, like Nick had said, what had happened last night really wasn't the end of the world. Nobody had died, it wasn't like he had gotten anybody pregnant, and - although he wasn't sure he could still say the same by the end of the day - there had been no screaming matches and insistence that someone was leaving the band. He knew he'd have to resign himself to a couple of days of awkwardness, but they'd get through it. 

He wasn't sure how long he had sat there for, but he glanced up after what he was pretty sure was only a couple of minutes, when there was a knock on the hotel door. He may have dozed off, he wasn't quite sure. 

Hauling himself to his feet, he went to open the door, biting his lip gently at the sight of Simon stood in the hall with his hands in his pockets, "Alright?" He said softly, stepping aside to let him in. He hadn't quite been prepared to deal with this just yet, but he supposed better sooner rather than later, right? 

"Sorry, I just le-" Simon trailed off after a moment, a frown crossing his face. He tilted his head over slightly so that he could look John in the eye, seemingly looking for something, "Fuck, Johnny. Already?" He eventually asked, the disapproval evident in his voice. He wasn't sure what he meant, until he noticed Simon glancing over at the glass table - where the evidence of the coke he had just done remained. Fuck, he got it now, his pupils were probably blown wide. 

So he just shrugged, looking away from Simon as he put his hands in his own pockets, "It's nothing, Charley. Why're you even here?"

Simon just looked at him for a moment longer, before rolling his eyes and stepping around him, "I came to get my wallet, left it here last night." He informed him, grabbing the aforementioned wallet from the bedside locker, "I didn't expect to find you already coked up, at.. nine thirty in the morning." 

"It's not really any of your business, is it?" He asked. 

He wouldn't usually have been so hostile, but then again, it had been a long time since Simon had said anything at all about his drug use. He knew they were both a little keyed up because of last night, though, so maybe Simon had come here looking for an argument. 

Surprisingly, Simon didn't rise to the bait though, he just sighed and shook his head, "I suppose not." He shrugged, before glancing up at John again, the apprehension clear on his face, "How high _were_ you last night?" He asked, "Because I know we were both drunk, but you were high as a kite too, weren't you?" 

Not quite knowing where this was coming from, he simply shrugged, doing his best to avoid Simon's eye, "No more than usual." He shrugged. He really wasn't sure what this was about. He'd offered Simon a bump last night, surely he had known that there was a little more than alcohol in his system, "You knew that, I offered you some." 

He didn't like the way Simon scoffed then, rolling his eyes, "Oh, so you remember that? I'm surprised, since you apparently don't remember much fucking else." He snapped, before pushing a hand up through his hair, a bitter laugh slipping out, "I thought.. fuck, never mind." 

"You thought what?"

"Nothing, doesn't matter." 

Simon sighed as he crossed the room to him then, leaning up to press a kiss to his still damp hair as he wrapped an arm around his shoulders, "It doesn't matter." 

He swallowed thickly, glancing down at his socked feet. He felt pretty awful, and he just.. he wasn't sure where they stood at this very moment. It would have been easier if Simon had come here looking for an argument, and they had had a screaming match at each other. He hadn't, though, he'd backed down almost as quickly as he'd gotten riled up, and he really didn't know what he was supposed to do about it. He did feel a little like he was being babied though, and he usually would have protested that fact. Right now, though, he was just relieved that Simon was still speaking to him. He'd take what he could get - because like Simon had just said, they'd both been drunk last night, but he'd been high as a kite too.

He sighed as he leaned in to Simon's arm around him, knocking his forehead against the older man's shoulder. Fuck, he didn't want to fight, he didn't want to put any more strain on the band than there already was, "Promise we're alright?" He asked, his words muffled slightly against the material of Simon's t-shirt. 

"Yeah, course, you know we are." Simon told him. 

He lifted his head from Simon's shoulder then, attempting a small smile as he met his eyes - which he was relieved to see was returned. Obviously last night had been a mistake for a multitude of reasons - a mistake that had been fuelled by too much alcohol and drugs and lust - and so he didn't want to lose Simon because of this when he had just gotten him back. For the band's sake as well as his own. 

"Alright. We should just.. forget it happened, yeah?" He suggested. 

He couldn't really see any other solution to this situation that they had created for themselves. He, Simon and Nick were all that was left, and so they couldn't afford to let this get in between them. 

He was ignoring the fact that he and Simon had been really fucking good together. He was ignoring the fact that Simon's cologne - same as the one he'd obviously been wearing last night - had ignited a warmth curling in his stomach. He was ignoring the fact that Simon's eyes were actually a really pretty shade of blue, something he'd never really noticed before this very moment. They were mates, that was all they would ever be, and he certainly didn't want Simon pulling away because he picked up on something from him.

Surprisingly, Simon seemed to hesitate for a split second, before smiling and nodding, "Yeah, it's forgotten." 

He wasn't sure what to make of the fact that he hadn't agreed to his suggestion as readily as he'd imagined he would, but he figured that it was probably best not to think too hard about it. Maybe he wanted to talk about it further, to try and clear the air between them a little more, but he just.. he figured this was okay. Once they were on the same page - that they agreed there was no bad blood between them and that they could just forget about it - he assumed they'd be fine. Maybe he had always just preferred to ignore conflict rather than act on it, but it had served him pretty well in the past. 

"Come on." Simon started again after a moment, "Let's get breakfast. Get some food into you, you skinny bastard."

"Fuck off." He huffed, although he was unable to quite keep himself from smiling.

  
-x-

  
The following days were, well.. he didn't really know what to make of them, if he was being honest. 

He'd been so fucking relieved when he and Simon had managed to get through the rest of that first day without any awkwardness arising between them. They had managed the drive back to Birmingham - and thankfully Nick hadn't said anything at all about the fact that he knew what had happened between them. He wouldn't have been surprised if he had mentioned it during the drive, and had asked whether they'd sorted things out between them or not. Thankfully though, he seemed to sense that the atmosphere between them had lightened, and so he hadn't let on. 

By that evening, he felt as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders by the time he got back to his own flat. He and Simon would be okay, he could see that now. 

It was the days that followed that had him rethinking that assessment though. 

At first, he hadn't even noticed. They had left things on good terms, there was nothing to even indicate that Simon wasn't completely happy with the way they had left things. 

Aside from a couple of local shows in the next few days, they didn't really have much going on. Ordinarily, that meant just a bit of space from each other. With recording the album, they had spent a lot of time in each others company, so naturally they would want some time off doing their own thing. Now though, it felt like Simon was deliberately attempting to put some space between them. 

He hadn't really noticed it until the third time that Simon had blown him off when he'd called to see if he wanted to grab lunch or go for a drink, or something along those lines. He was determined to maintain the easy friendship that they had - and he assumed that Simon was thinking along the same lines. They had always palled around outside of work, often spending the evening at each others' flats or in the pub together. Now though, it seemed that whenever he called, Simon was always _'just on the way out the door'_ , or he _'already had lunch plans, sorry, mate, next time'_. 

As he'd said though, he hadn't realised that it was a deliberate thing until he'd been speaking to Nick on the phone one afternoon and had mentioned that he'd invited Simon over for dinner, but that he'd claimed to be busy that evening. At Nick's loaded silence, he'd demanded to know what was going on. It was only then that Nick admitted that he'd also spoken to Simon earlier that morning, and that he'd apparently told Nick that he had no plans whatsoever that day. 

Right. 

Simon was obviously avoiding him, and he really wasn't sure what he was supposed to do with that information. Their first show was in two days, and so he wasn't sure what sort of atmosphere to expect when they got together for their rehearsal and sound check the afternoon before the show. Fuck, this was exactly what he'd been trying to avoid. 

_"I thought you two had sorted things out?"_ Nick had asked him over the phone. 

"We did! Or I thought we did anyway." He said with a sigh, dragging a hand through his hair in frustration, "What am I supposed to do?"

_"When you said you two had spoken, what exactly was said?"_

He rolled his eyes, slouching back on his sofa, "I suggested that we should forget it ever happened, he agreed." 

_"So you didn't actually discuss it?"_

"And how exactly are we supposed to discuss it?" He asked, "I'm sorry I got drunk and put my hands all over you? I'm sorry I let you put your hands all over me? There's nothing else to be said about it, so I really don't see how talking about it any further will help the issue." 

_"Hey, you and Simon got yourselves into this mess, so don't get snappy with me over it."_

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose for a moment, "You're right. Fuck, I'm sorry, I just.. I don't know what I'm supposed to do." 

_"Look, the show is in two days. You'll be there, he'll be there, just try and get a word with him then."_

He supposed that Nick was right. If it turned out that Simon was in fact avoiding him, it wasn't like he could just duck out of the rehearsal or the show itself. He'd have to face him sooner or later, whether he wanted to or not.

  
-x-

  
The day of the show, he wasn't quite sure if he was relieved or disappointed at the fact that he had arrived to the venue before Simon had. 

With the band getting together for a short rehearsal and sound check before the show tonight, he had deliberately arrived early in the hopes that he could pull Simon aside for a chat before they got to work - the venue owners thankfully letting him in to wait for the rest of the band and crew inside. What exactly he wanted to say to Simon once he finally got to him, he didn't really know. He just.. he knew that they had to try and clear the air between them - properly this time.

He had to admit though, he didn't really know how the fuck he was supposed to tackle this. He has assumed that they were alright, that they had already gotten over the awkwardness of the other morning in the hotel. What was he supposed to do if Simon refused to have this conversation though, or if he just refused to acknowledge that there even was anything wrong. They had a tour coming up - and a tour meant interviews and press conferences, long journeys cramped into planes and cars together. People would definitely notice if he and Simon were barely on speaking terms, and he knew it would only be unpleasant for everybody involved if they were sat down and given a speaking to about it. 

Swallowing thickly, he turned his attention back to the bass that he was holding in his lap. He could use a cigarette right about now, but he didn't particularly fancy going outside to stand in the rain while he smoked - and he knew that the venue owners sometimes got a bit funny about them smoking indoors. Realistically, he knew that he could have scrounged up a bump of coke from somebody, but he just.. Simon already hadn't been happy with him when he had found him coked up the morning after they had slept together. It would have been foolish to go looking for drugs right now. 

He closed his eyes as he plucked at the bass strings, quietly humming alongside the tune that flowed from the instrument. Usually, he didn't particularly like playing without a drummer to play against - one of the reasons he barely ever practiced when he was at home - but he had to admit that it was nice to just get down to the bare bones of a song sometimes, to feel the rhythm of tune without any lyrics or overlays. 

Somehow, he managed to lose himself in the sound of the track, and he hadn't even realised that he was no longer alone until he felt a warm hand on his shoulder, and he glanced up to see Simon, "I know that tune, what is that?" He asked, leaning his forearm a little more heavily on John's shoulder as he stretched to look over his shoulder - presumably to see whether or not he was playing from paper. 

_"Some Like it Hot."_ He answered with a small smile of his own, looking up at Simon. He was fond of the rhythm that had come together for that song - and while it was odd to have gone through the recording process without the other members of Duran - save for Andy, of course - he was proud of the record and the songs that had come out of the Power Station project.

He began to pluck at the strings again, smiling as Simon bobbed his head in time with the rhythm, _"Some like it hot, and some sweat when the heat is on."_ He sang, stepping away from John as he went to retrieve the set lists that the younger man had already dug out when he had arrived earlier, _"Some feel the heat and decide that they can't go on."_

He smiled as he watched Simon, taking advantage of the way the older man wasn't paying him any attention to just really look at him. He was leant back against the table, legs crossed at the ankles as he skimmed through the set list that they had agreed on for tonight. Dressed in blue jeans and a white t-shirt, oversized denim jacket over the t-shirt and a headband wrapped around his forehead to finish off the look - he couldn't help but notice that their singer really was quite beautiful, and he mentally berated himself for not having noticed that until they had drunkenly fallen into bed together. 

"Bloody hell, that's a great tune." He remarked, grin on his face as he looked back up at John after a moment, "You couldn't have saved it for us, no?" 

He smiled, rolling his eyes before glancing back down at his bass, "You just want to be able to take credit for it." He teased with a grin. He was proud of the song, of the whole album really, but no; he knew that it wouldn't have worked if they had tried to write it as a Duran Duran song. It was too different from the sound that they had established with Duran Duran. It had come as a result of needing to get out and do their own thing before coming back to the band. He knew Simon and Nick had felt the same way too, putting their own album out with Arcadia before coming back to Duran. 

They had managed to get it out of their systems though, and even though Roger and Andy hadn't come back, at least he still had Simon and Nick.

He glanced over to where Nick and Warren were busy chatting to a couple of the sound techs, neither of their attentions too particularly focused on either Simon or John. Figuring that this was probably the best moment that they'd get all day, he looked back at Simon as he stood to set his bass back in it's stand, "Hey, Charley. Uh, can we talk?" He asked. 

"Later. Nick was already bitching on the way over that we're running late as it is." Simon shrugged, turning his attention back to the set list he was holding, "I think we need to tighten up _Wild Boys_ a little, something wasn't hitting right the last time we tried it." 

Recognising that for the brush off that it obviously was, he sighed and nodded as he reached back for his own set list, "I can pare down the bass, tidy it up a little." 

'Yeah, that could work." Simon said with a nod, dragging a hand through his hair, "I want to talk to the others, see can we ramp up the drums a little bit. Oi, Nick." He called, stepping away from John as he approached the others. 

Sighing, he got up to follow after Simon. He really doubted that they'd actually get another chance to talk throughout the day, like he'd said, they were already running a little bit behind schedule, and the show would be on them before they knew it. Once they were finished with the rehearsal and sound check, they'd probably only have time for a quick bite to eat before they had to get ready for the show itself. Maybe after the show, but he wasn't about to hold his breath over it either. 

Part of him couldn't help but wonder though, if Simon had deliberately arrived late so that they could avoid having this conversation. He tried to tell himself that that couldn't have been the case, that Simon wouldn't have gone that far out of his way to avoid him. Still, it was fucking annoying, he wanted the air totally cleared between them before they set out on the tour.

The rest of the rehearsal went pretty smoothly actually. It had been a long time since the three of them had played a live show together - he had toured with the Power Station, but Live Aid was the last time Simon and Nick had played a live show at all. So, almost frosty atmosphere between himself and Simon aside, it was pretty nice to get to play with the other two again. He was glad that they had had the opportunity for these few small shows before the actual tour though, so at least they could work out any kinks in their performance before they took to the stage in Japan. 

They played through the songs on the set list - obviously starting off with their newer songs from _Notorious_ , and then getting more into their older hits like _Hungry Like the Wolf_ and _Planet Earth_. It was the songs from _Notorious_ that really took the most work though, considering the fact that the album was only just out. At this point, he was pretty sure he could play the songs from their first album with his eyes closed. From there, they just tidied things up, tweaked the parts that hadn't been sounding quite right.

It was nice to just lose himself in the music though, to let the melodies of Nick's synths and the strum of his bass be at the forefront of his mind rather than whatever the fuck he was going to do about the situation with Simon. 

He didn't realise that they were running well over the time that they had allotted themselves for the rehearsal, until Nick let out a frustrated 'bollocks'. 

"What?" He asked, glancing up from the notes he was flicking through with Steve. Like he'd promised Simon before they'd started, he and Steve were busy figuring out how to clean up the drums and bass for _Wild Boys_. 

"We're running over." Nick said, prompting him to take a glance at his own watch. Fuck, right, just about enough time for them to let the crew get the stage set up while they went back to the hotel to get themselves ready for tonight. He was starving too, now that he had a second to think about it - maybe he'd give one of the crew hands a couple of pounds to go grab them sandwiches or something from the shop around the corner while they were at the hotel. Usually, a celebratory dinner out would have been the case, but they'd left themselves with little enough time as it was.

As he handed his bass over to one of the techs, he glanced over at Simon, biting his lip gently. Sod it, it would only take a minute to attempt to clear the air between them, make sure that they really were alright. So he approached him, slapping on a small smile as he did - he wasn't looking for a fight after all, quite the opposite, really, "Charley, hey. Listen, I wante-" 

"For God's sake, John. I said later." Simon snapped - to his surprise, actually.

Raising his eyebrows at the outburst, he eventually sighed as he rolled his eyes, "Fine, whatever. I'll see you guys back at the hotel." He muttered as he stepped away, grabbing his coat. 

If Simon wanted to have a tantrum over this, then whatever, he could do what he bloody well liked. But he wasn't about to stand there and let him speak to him like he was a child. He'd done his bit - or had attempted to anyway - and so if Simon wanted to keep on pushing him away and pretending like he wasn't, he was pretty sure that it wasn't up to him to feel responsible for it anymore.

He was still seething by the time he got back to his hotel room - having decided to go on ahead and let the others follow when they were good and ready. 

It was fucking ridiculous. At the time, if he had known what kind of rift in the band that sleeping with Simon would cause, he definitely wouldn't have gone through with it - high or not. Since then, though, he'd done everything he could to try and fix things between them, and yet Simon was still acting like a child and refusing to budge. It was more than a little infuriating. 

There was absolutely no way that he was attempting to deal with Simon sober tonight though, and so he crouched next to his bag so that he could search through it until he found the bag of white power he had hidden in his toiletry bag earlier. Just one hit would be enough to get him through the show tonight - he wasn't planning on getting wired to the point where he could barely string sentences together. Getting drunk was out of the question. He could still function with a bump or two of coke, but he knew Nick would personally string him up and cut his balls off if he got wasted before the show. In keeping up with his behaviour, Simon probably wouldn't even notice. 

By the time he had showered and dressed, he wasn't quite as angry as he had been when he'd first gotten back to the hotel. As he sprayed his hair though, he couldn't deny that he felt slightly on edge. Fuck, but why was Simon being so blockheaded over this whole thing? 

In the back of his mind, he knew it was an effect of the drugs. Sometimes the coke made him feel like he was on top of the world, and sometimes they made him paranoid and obsessive. It didn't take a genius to guess which it was this time. 

Aside from that though, he just couldn't understand why Simon was refusing to move past this. They had agreed to just forget that it had happened, and he was doing the best he could to hold up his end of the promise. It wasn't easy though, when Simon was refusing to speak to him. Whatever, like he'd said, Simon could have his tantrum for however long he wanted to. He wasn't about to beg for him to let this go.

He went back down to the lobby once he was satisfied that his appearance was up to par, stepping just outside the door to light a cigarette. He only needed to get through the show tonight - naturally there would be celebratory drinks after the show, but he could easily find himself a pretty girl to spend the rest of the evening with. 

He was joined by Nick after an moment, who nodded at him in greeting before lighting his own cigarette. His white blazer was pristine, his dark eye makeup offsetting the white blonde of his hair. He looked a hell of a lot better than John felt - although he knew that that wouldn't be hard at this point, he was pretty sure the bump of coke he had taken before his shower wasn't quite agreeing with him, he could feel the sweat already beading at his hairline and the back of his neck.

"What's with the dark cloud?" Nick eventually asked, raising an eyebrow in his direction. 

"What? Nothing." 

"Clearly." Nick deadpanned, "You look as though you're about to tear the head off whoever so much as looks at you next." 

He shrugged, slouching back against the wall as he took another drag of his cigarette, letting the smoke fill his lungs, "My stomach is at me, is all." He shrugged. It wasn't exactly a lie, Nick just didn't need to know the reasons for it. 

"Would this have anything to do with how you stormed out of the venue after speaking to Simon earlier?" Nick asked. At his extended silence in response to the question, Nick sighed, taking a deep drag of his own cigarette, "John-" 

"He's being a prick." He shrugged, "It's nothing to worry about, it'll sort itself out." 

He could tell that Nick wasn't convinced, but he didn't exactly want to get into it. He had already complained to the younger man about what was going on with himself and Simon, and he really didn't want to burden him with it any further. It was his own shit to deal with. Besides, if Nick had noticed that he was high, he at least hadn't acknowledged it yet, and he'd prefer to keep it that way. 

He looked back at him, eventually mustering up a smile as he knocked his elbow with his own, "I mean it. It's nothing." 

Nick was prevented from saying anything further when they were joined by the others, Simon laughing at something Warren had said as they walked through the lobby. He couldn't help the flare of irritation he felt at that though - at the realisation that he was the only one of the two that seemed to be bothered about the whole thing. It wouldn't have been quite so frustrating if Simon had been feeling the same way as he was, but he just.. he couldn't get a handle on what the older man was thinking. 

He dropped the remnant of his cigarette, stepping on the butt to put out the embers, before glancing up at Nick with another smile that he hoped didn't look as forced as it felt, "Come on, the fans wait for nobody." He said with a flourish, deliberately avoiding even glancing in Simon's direction as he walked past them to the car that would take them back to the venue. 

  
-x-

  
By the time they got back to the venue, he could feel the anxiety starting to curl in his stomach again - and he was thankful for the fact that he had slipped the bag of coke into the inside pocket of his jacket before leaving the hotel room.

It was only a couple of hours, he could easily get through that without fucking up. Besides, it wasn't like it was an interview or press talk or anything like that - he didn't have to slap on a smile and make nice with Simon in front of the cameras. It was a big stage, he could keep to his own side, and Simon could do whatever he bloody well liked. Still, he couldn't help the relief he felt at the fact that it was a small enough venue - similar to the type of shows they played back at the Rum Runner back in the early days, rather than a big stadium show. 

'Stage in fifteen' they were told once they arrived to the venue, and he quickly patted his pockets before glancing over at Nick, "I've got to go to the bathroom, back in a minute." 

He could feel eyes on him as he walked off to go to the bathroom, but honestly? He didn't really fucking care. He was just going to the bathroom, there was nothing suspicious about that - okay so he was going to the bathroom to cut a quick line of coke, but at least he was being discreet about it. 

Shutting himself in the cubicle, he crouched next to the toilet with the lid shut, almost running on autopilot as he tipped some of the white powder onto the lid. Once he had sniffed the line, he took a moment to just lean back against the wall of the cubicle with his eyes closed, letting himself feel the effects of the drug as they washed over him. 

Eventually though, he could hear somebody out in the main bathroom stall, and so he figured it was probably time he went back out to the others. Quickly rubbing his nose, he let himself out of the cubicle, doing his best not to roll his eyes when he found Simon by one of the sinks, washing his hands.

"What?" He asked, upon noticing that Simon was watching him as he washed his own hands. 

"Nothing." 

Rolling his eyes, he shoved his hands in his pockets as he let himself out of the bathroom. He wasn't in the mood for this right now - he wasn't in the mood for Simon's disapproving looks, or for another argument or whatever. He just wanted to get through this show, so that they could get to a club afterwards, and he could find himself a pretty girl and a bottle of liquor to spend the evening with.

He dragged a hand through his hair as he joined the others, finding them bent together over a set list, Nick looking incredibly frustrated as he chewed at the end of a pen, "What's going on?" He asked.

Nick glanced up at him, sighing after a moment, "We're trying to figure out which of the _Notorious_ songs to drop. Simon wants to play _Hold Back the Rain_ instead." He explained, before turning back to the sheet, "Maybe Union of the Snake, actually? We wouldn't have to drop a song from Notorious that way." 

"Does he, now?" He asked, doing his best not to grit his teeth even though he could feel the irritation flaring again. They'd never spoken about it, but he knew exactly what that song was supposed to be about - and so he couldn't help but feel pissed off about the fact that he suddenly wanted to add it to their set list, "Fine, I don't fucking care, just tell me where we're putting it." He muttered as he stepped away to grab his bass. 

If Simon wanted to keep up this incredibly childish act, he wasn't about to rise to the bait. 

He just didn't understand the silent treatment that he was getting. He would have understood if they'd had a massive blow up at each other and weren't on speaking terms, but nothing like that had even happened. They'd been fine, and now they suddenly weren't, and he didn't know what to do about it. Sod it, they had a show to play, he wasn't about to worry about it now. 

The show itself was, well.. okay, maybe he shouldn't have taken that second hit of coke in the bathroom. 

He knew that he probably wouldn't have been quite as on edge if he had been totally sober, but he was chalking the churning feeling in his stomach up to the tension between himself and Simon. He did have to admit though, that he could feel himself sweating underneath the stage lights.

They opened with _A View to a Kill_ , before working their way through the songs from the new album. As they played through the songs though, he was reminded of why the three of them had fought so hard for this album. The songs were so different to anything that they had put out before, and he knew that they had been right to stick to their guns rather than bowing under the pressure and putting out the sort of album that the studio wanted them to put out. It wasn't the typical Duran sound, but the eighties were coming to an end, and so he knew they had to adapt if they wanted to stay relevant. 

Still, he knew his playing wasn't up to scratch, and it wasn't hard to see that the rest of the band could see that too. If the audience could tell, they didn't let on - still screaming their names and clapping at the end of every song, singing along with the lyrics of the songs. From where he was at the front of the stage, he couldn't quite make out Nick and Steve's reactions, Warren seemed to be politely ignoring every flat note that came from his bass, but the most frustrating of all was Simon's reaction. That was to say that there was no reaction from the older man - he seemed to barely even acknowledge that they were on the same stage.

He knew it was stupid to let it get to him, but he couldn't help the flare of annoyance he felt at the sight of Simon singing into Warren's microphone and draping himself all over the guitarist. He knew that it was only for the crowds' benefit, it was nothing that they themselves hadn't done a hundred times before. That was just it though, it was supposed to be _their_ thing. 

He wasn't jealous though. Fuck that. It wasn't like he even wanted Simon's attention right now. He was just.. fuck, he didn't even know. He was just pissed off at the entire situation. He felt like shit, he knew he was playing shit, and Simon would barely spare a glance in his direction as they continued through their songs - their own, as well as a version of _Election Day_ and _Some Like it Hot._

Maybe it was down to the drugs that he'd taken just before the show, but he felt like the walls were closing in around him a little. He was trying his best, but his jaw was starting to ache from grinding his teeth, and his palms felt clammy - fingers sliding on the strings of his bass. 

It didn't help either that - at Simon's insistence - they had added _Hold Back the Rain_ to the set list at the very last moment. He knew that that was supposed to be a dig at him, and it was pretty infuriating that Simon was reverting back to making comments through song rather than just saying whatever he wanted to say to his face. Obviously he knew that the older man didn't approve of his drug use, but aside from sliding that song underneath his door all those years ago, they had never spoken about it. He wasn't about to give him the satisfaction of knowing he'd successfully managed to get under his skin though, so unless Simon wanted to actually say it to his face? He was refusing to even acknowledge the dig. 

They had managed to squeeze it in between _Hold Me_ and _Planet Earth_ \- shortening both _Hold Me_ and _Hold Back the Rain_ so that they didn't have to cut either of the songs - and so by the time they reached _Planet Earth_ , he was pissed off all over again. The audience were probably none the wiser, but he was pretty sure Nick at least - if maybe not Warren and Steve - had guessed Simon's reasons for wanting to play the song, and yet, nobody had brought it up. 

He knew that he'd been playing shit all night, but the first really noticeable fuck up had come during _Planet Earth_. His playing hadn't been too obvious because there were the sounds of the other instruments to cover it, but eventually the break in the song came where the bass should have been the only instrument playing - and he was so far deep into his own head that he didn't realise he had completely missed his mark. 

"John." Simon hissed, finally catching his attention. 

To his horror, he realised that the rest of the band were attempting to stall, obviously to cover for the fact that he had just forgotten to come in for his most important part of the song. He quickly shook it off and plucked at his bass, although he inwardly cringed at the harsh _twang_ of the strings - obviously a result of his clammy hands. 

He didn't even attempt to catch Simon's eye again after that. It wasn't hard to see from that split second that he'd finally gotten a reaction out of him - however unintentional it had been. Still, he didn't doubt that he'd get an earful from him later about his performance throughout the entire show, so he'd just try and shake it off until then.

He managed to hold it together until the end of the show without making any other jarring mistakes, although he was pretty sure his relief was obvious when they had finally played the last note of the encore. He hung around for the customary smiling and waving while Simon said goodnight to the audience, although he certainly didn't stay out on the stage for any longer than was required. 

He didn't get too far once they had actually left the stage though, having only handed his bass off to one of the techs, before Simon caught him by the arm and basically frogmarched him away from the rest of the band. Rolling his eyes, he went with it, although they didn't go too far before he tugged his arm out of Simon's grasp and turned on him, "Get off me, _what?"_

"What the fuck was that?" Simon asked, and it wasn't hard to see that he was furious. Right now, he was a little too distracted by both his annoyance towards Simon and the comedown from the drugs he had taken earlier - but he had to admit that he'd probably have felt the same way if their positions had been reversed. 

"Oh, finally. He speaks." 

"What?" Simon asked, before rolling his eyes, "Fucking hell, how high are you? Did you _hear_ yourself playing? Do you even care that you made a complete and utter show of us out there?"

"So that's what it takes then, is it? I've got to embarrass the entire band on stage before you'll even acknowledge my existence?" He asked, folding his arms as he looked at him. Despite the fact that this was what he'd wanted, that he'd been looking for a reaction from him, he was already over this entire conversation. 

"What are you on about?"

"You! I've been trying my bloody hardest to have a conversation with you, and you've blown me off every single fucking time. And dropping in _Hold Back the Rain_ last fucking second? That's bollocks and you know it." He snapped. 

"What, so you got so high you could barely play your bass and now you're blaming it on me?" 

"Oh, piss off. I didn't-" He started, although he sighed and tugged a hand through his hair after a moment. Fuck, he'd never wanted them to end up at each others throats like this. That was the whole point of why he'd wanted to talk this out earlier on, to avoid any screaming matches with each other. Besides, he hadn't been that high, his shitty performance had come as a result of his anxiety over this situation, "What's going on, Charley? I thought we were alright. I thought.. shit, we said that we'd just forget that that night ever happened." 

"No, _you_ said that, John." 

"And you agreed with me!"

"What else was I supposed to do?" Simon asked, and he honestly wasn't sure what to make of the fact that the hostile expression on his face had turned almost vulnerable. 

He was.. well, he had to admit, he was very confused. He'd thought that they were on the same page, that Simon had been happy for them to just move on and pretend that nothing more had ever happened between them. Maybe it wasn't the healthiest of decisions, but they were both young blokes - talking about his feelings wasn't his forte, and he knew that it wasn't Simon's either. Still, he assumed he would have said something if he wasn't happy. 

"Simon, I d-" 

He was cut off from any further questions by Simon pushing him back against the wall and out of sight of anyone else who might have been lingering near them. Naturally, his first instinct was to throw his hands up - even though he knew deep down that Simon wouldn't actually give him a smack or anything. What he hadn't been expecting though, was for Simon to pull him in with a hand on the back of his neck and press their lips together in a kiss, hard enough that their teeth clacked together painfully. 

After a moment though, both Simon's touch and his kiss turned gentle, although he pulled away from him before John could even attempt to return the kiss. 

"I can't just forget about it." He said softly, not quite looking John in the eye as he toyed with the collar of his shirt, "I can't. So I just.. I need a bit of time." 

He honestly didn't know what to say. He thought.. fuck, he'd thought Simon had been as shaken by the fact that they had slept together as he was, he hadn't for a second thought that he might have actually wanted that. If he had known, he wouldn't have taken off the way he had that morning, and he certainly wouldn't have suggested that they just forget the whole thing. If he was being perfectly honest though, he wasn't sure what he would have done, but he would have at least tried to handle the situation a little more tactfully. 

"I.. you never said anything." 

"Really? What was I supposed to say?" Simon asked, and although he was relieved to see that he didn't seem quite as angry as he had been, he didn't like the way he seemed almost resigned, "You wanted to forget about the whole thing, so I'm trying. And I will, I just need a bit of time to do that." 

"But, I thought-" He started, although he didn't even know what he wanted to say. How was he supposed to say that he'd since noticed that Simon's eyes were a particularly pretty shade of blue, or that the stretch of his legs looked about a mile long in the jeans he was wearing. He didn't know what exactly it was that Simon wanted from him - or how long he had wanted it for - so he didn't feel right about attempting to stutter his way through an explanation of how he felt.

Simon shook his head though, plastering on a reassuring smile, "It's fine, Johnny. It doesn't matter." 

It doesn't matter. 

Fuck, was that what he'd been talking about when they had tried to talk the morning after they had slept together? He had started to say something before cutting himself off and saying that it didn't matter. How could he have thought that something like this didn't matter?

"I'm sorry about tonight." He eventually mumbled, just because he really couldn't think of anything else to say, "My head just wasn't in it." 

To his surprise, Simon sighed and pulled him into a hug. He went easily with it, pressing his face into the older man's shoulder, "It's alright." He said softly, "It's just one show, it's not the end of the world." 

He was cut off from saying anything further by Nick approaching them, a slightly hesitant expression on his face - as though he wasn't sure what sort of situation he was expecting to find them in, "We're heading out, Warren says the club around the corner is decent." 

Simon glanced in his direction, although he just shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets, "You guys go on. I don't feel too well, I'm just going to head back to the hotel." 

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, have fun." He said with a small smile, clapping a hand on Simon's shoulder. 

He knew it was probably arousing some sort of suspicion that he was willingly choosing not to go out drinking with the rest of the band, but he just.. he really wasn't in the right headspace for it right now. He didn't know how he was supposed to spend the evening with them and pretend that everything was alright, but his earlier plan of finding a pretty girl to spend the evening with didn't feel quite right now that he knew Simon felt.. something for him. He knew he had his moments of being an arsehole, but he wouldn't do that. 

"Alright, well you know where we are if you change your mind." Nick told him, with a quick touch to his elbow. 

"Yeah, go on." He said with a small smile. 

If he was deliberately doing his best to avoid catching Simon's eye again, he didn't let on. 

  
-x-

  
Over the next couple of days, he did what he was asked - and honestly? It suited him pretty well. 

Obviously Simon had asked for some time to get over the fact that they had slept together, but he hadn't realised before now that he would probably benefit from some time apart too.

How had he not seen this coming? He had known Simon for what.. six, seven years now, and never once had he imagined that friendship wasn't the only thing that the older man felt towards him. Knowing it now, though, it obviously had him thinking about the way that he and Simon tended to act around each other. Obviously they played it up for the fans while they were on stage - draping themselves all over each other, even kissing each other - and he couldn't help but wonder now how much of it had been real on Simon's behalf while he had remained completely oblivious. 

Fuck, he felt _awful_. 

How many times had he playfully kissed Simon for other peoples benefit, not knowing that that was exactly what the older man wanted from him? How many times had he dropped down to sit in his lap, how many times had he held his hand? They had been carrying on like that for years, and he'd never even had an inkling.

For a brief moment, he was actually rather annoyed with Simon. Why had he never said anything? His annoyance didn't last long though, because he supposed that he couldn't really have expected him to say anything. If their situations were reversed, he wouldn't have been too keen to say anything either. Shit, he already had been hesitant to say anything, and he hadn't even pinned down for sure what it was that he felt for Simon. 

Obviously he could say for sure that Simon was an attractive bloke - he'd have to have been blind not to notice that much. There was also no denying that their one sexual encounter had been.. well, hot as hell was one way of putting it. Okay, so he knew he'd panicked and had taken off when he'd woken up that morning to find himself in Simon's arms, but it certainly hadn't been because the sex had been bad. 

He couldn't help but wonder though, if he would have reacted differently had he known about Simon's feelings for him. Probably not, considering he hadn't ever considered his own feelings for Simon. He probably would have tried to be a little more sensitive about the issue - rather than just taking off - but he hadn't really started to consider the fact that he might actually be slightly attracted to Simon until the couple of days after. This was all new to him, he'd never been with a man before. 

Back to his point though. He had been reluctant to even admit that much to Simon, for fear that he wouldn't respond well to the information. So he knew he couldn't be annoyed with him for not having said anything about his own feelings.

Still, the next show was a couple of days away, so at least they had that time to themselves that they both agreed they needed.

Didn't mean that he didn't miss him, though. 

That Sunday morning, he found himself without any plans for the day, and honestly? He didn't really mind. There had been a lot going on lately with recording the album and that mess of a show that they had played the other night, and so he found that he was actually pretty grateful for the fact that he had no plans today. Maybe he wouldn't even change out of his pyjamas, who knew? 

He'd gotten up early enough, although after pottering around the flat for an hour or two - doing laundry and tidying the kitchen, real rockstar business - he headed back to bed with a cup of coffee. Sunday mornings usually meant reruns of _M*A*S*H_ or some other show that he was fond of, and so he was perfectly happy to stay curled up in bed and watch television for a couple of hours, loose fitting t-shirt on and glasses perched on his nose.

After an hour or so though, the phone out in the kitchen rang, and so he dragged himself out of bed with a groan to go and answer it, "Hello?" He mumbled, running his fingers through his hair. Okay, so he'd decided he probably wouldn't even change out of his pyjamas today, but he figured that he should probably have a shower at least. 

_"Hey, John."_

"Rog!" He beamed, tucking the phone between his cheek and his shoulder as he settled down at the table, "It's good to hear from you." He said with a smile. He meant that, it had been too long since he'd heard from Roger. Ever since the drummer had left the band, the phone calls and visits had been few and far between. He knew it was nothing personal though - he was just busy with the band, and Roger was busy with his own life.

_"Yeah, you too. It's been too long."_

"It has, yeah. What's going on?"

_"I'm actually in town for the day, I thought you might want to get lunch or something later?"_

"I'll have to check my incredibly busy rockstar calendar first." He teased, before huffing out a breath of laughter, "I'm joking, I haven't even showered yet. Lunch sounds good though, d'you want to come over here?" He asked. The Duran Duran mania had died down a little since the early eighties, but if they were milling around town on their days off, chances were that they'd still get stopped by at least one fan. It was easier sometimes to just stay in when they could - especially now that Roger wanted to stay out of the limelight. 

_"Yeah, cool. I'll see you in an hour, so?"_

"An hour is perfect, see you then." He said with a smile, before hanging up. There was no point really in catching up over the phone, considering they'd see each other soon. 

He was looking forward to seeing Roger though. Like they had said, it had been too long - and at least it would give him an excuse to get out of bed properly and get dressed. 

He had at least already tidied the flat that morning when he'd gotten up, so he didn't have to worry about that much. Besides, he doubted Roger would really think twice about it if the place had been turned upside down when he had arrived. He wasn't sure that Nick had ever had one, but he had personally never really grown out of his messy teenaged boy phase. He was trying to change out of the habit, but he tended to leave mess behind him wherever he went. 

By the time Roger showed up though, he had at least managed to shower and mostly dry his hair. Thankful for the fact that he wasn't getting ready for some event with the band, he just changed into an old pair of jeans and a different t-shirt, and didn't bother with hairspray or to even really style his hair properly. 

It wasn't too long after he'd finished getting ready that there was a knock on the door, and he grinned as he went to open it, "Alright?" He said with a smile, stepping aside to let Roger in. Christ, it really had been too long. 

"Busy day, obviously?" Roger asked with a smile of his own, as he followed him in to the flat. 

"Piss off, this is the first totally free day that we've had. Some of us are still working for a living." He teased. 

"I'm surprised Simon isn't here, is all. Glued at the bloody hip." 

He cracked a small smile then, ducking his head. Alright, so he had him there. Usually Simon would have been here on quiet days like this, the two of them just occupying the same space without even really hanging out together. He tried not to think of how that hadn't happened since he and Simon had slept together - how things hadn't even really felt easy or comfortable between them. Still, he didn't need to mention that right now. 

"So, what's got you in this neck of the woods?" He eventually asked, just for an excuse to change the subject. It was nice to just see Roger and get the chance to catch up with him again, he didn't want to bring down the mood by getting into the situation between himself and Simon.

"We brought the girls up to see Gio's parents and she went shopping with her mum. I offered to drive them and come with, but she told me to hang out with one of you for the afternoon." Roger admitted with a laugh. 

"Aw, mate. You'd rather third wheel with your missus and mum-in-law?" 

"I thought I was being helpful." 

He laughed then, rolling his eyes. He supposed it was sweet though, Roger and Giovanna had always been smitten with each other - and even if he never outright said it, he hoped to have that with somebody some day.

"D'you want a beer? I can open a bottle of wine?" He suggested as they trailed into the kitchen. Maybe it was a bit early to be cracking into the drink, but it wasn't like it was the crack of dawn or anything. Besides, Roger was here for a catch up, it might be nice to have a couple of drinks together. 

Roger shook his head though, giving him a small smile, "No, thanks, I'm driving. I'll have a coffee, though." He shrugged. Maybe it was for the best though. Still, he guessed that Roger probably would have said no to the offer of a drink even if he hadn't been driving. Ever since leaving the band and settling down with his girls, he seemed to have really embraced the quiet life. He admired him for his dedication to it though, he certainly wouldn't have been able for it. 

It was nice to just catch up with him though, to talk about what they had each been up to since they had last seen each other. Obviously he told Roger about the new album, about how things had been going on the band front, while Roger told him all about how he and the girls were getting on. It was nice, he missed having Roger around. 

"So-" Roger eventually started, looking over at John from the opposite end of the couch where he was sat, "I read the reviews of the show the other night, what happened?" 

He couldn't help but cringe at the thought of that show. _Christ_. By all standards, they should have given it their all - it was their first show as this new version of Duran Duran, and they really should have used it as a stepping stone to get people excited for the album and for the tour. He tried not to think too hard about the fact that Nick and Simon had put their all in to the show, and that it had really only been him who had fucked up. 

He hadn't actually read any of the reviews. He didn't want to hear what critics had to say. 

He just shrugged, shoving his hands in his pockets as he slouched a little further down on the couch, "My head was a bit all over the place, was all. I couldn't focus on the show." He shrugged. Obviously that night had been a bit of a disaster, for a multitude of reasons. Aside from the fact that he and Simon had been snappy with each other, the drugs he had taken before the show hadn't really agreed with him. It was just a cocktail of things that had had him feeling shitty, and it had most definitely been reflected in his performance. 

"Is everything alright?" Roger asked, and he looked so honestly concerned, that he couldn't help but want to pour his guts to him. 

"Yeah. Sort of. It's.." 

"What?" 

"Simon and I. We're not _not_ talking, exactly. We're just taking a bit of a break from each other." He explained. It had come at a shitty time was all, considering they had already had enough of a break from each other with their separate projects last year. So he felt, anyway, but Simon had said that he needed some time, and so he was only doing what was asked of him. 

"Did you have a row?" Roger asked, setting aside his cup of tea so that he could focus all of his attention on John.

"Sort of. Well, not exactly." He mumbled, tracing his fingers around the edge of his own mug for a moment, before sighing, "We slept together, the night of the album release party." 

He wasn't exactly sure why he kept fucking telling people about it. At this point he may as well just call Andy up in Newcastle and break the news, since he was now the only member of the original line up that wasn't aware of what had happened by now. The morning after it had happened though, he was just feeling a little too fragile to try and deal with it by himself - which was his reasoning for telling Nick about it. Now, he had no excuse really, other than that he felt he could confide in Roger. They had always been close, something he was pretty sure came from being two halves of the rhythm section.

"Shit, did he finally tell you?" 

Of everything that he'd been expecting Roger to say, that certainly hadn't been it. He had no idea what he meant by that either, "Tell me what?" He asked a frown crossing his face, "Did he tell me what, Rog?" He prompted, when Roger still hadn't answered him. 

Roger eventually sighed, running a hand through his own hair. He seemed slightly unwilling to say whatever it was that was on his mind, but fuck it, he had already opened up and told Roger what had happened, the least he could do was tell him what he'd meant by that. Besides, he had a feeling that it was something important, "John, you do know that Simon actually fancies you, yeah?" He eventually asked. 

"Well.. he kissed me after the show the other night." He said with a shrug. Aside from that though, and from saying that he couldn't just forget about the fact that they had been together, Simon hadn't actually said outright that he had feelings for him. It wasn't too hard to put two and two together though and realise that that was what he meant, "Wait, how do you know that?" 

Roger looked a little like he wished that he had never opened his mouth, although he at least didn't need any further prompting before he spoke again, "He told me. Shortly after one of the first shows at the Rum Runner." 

"Wait, _what?"_

"We were drunk. It was after one of the first shows, and you and Andy were off chasing the ladies. He seemed bloody miserable, and when I asked, he said he wasn't sure how he was supposed to sit by every night and watch you chase girl after girl." 

"But, I-" He started, although he really didn't know what he was supposed to say. Back in the Rum Runner days, he'd still been wearing his glasses, he'd still been introducing himself as Nigel before remembering that he wanted to be known as John. What the fuck was Simon supposed to have seen in him then? 

"I asked him about it the morning after. He pleaded with me not to say anything, said that getting the band off the ground was more important than whatever way he felt about you." 

"But that was _nineteen-fucking-eighty!"_

Honestly? His heart fucking broke for Simon. 

He'd been sitting on this for six years? He had tried to tell himself that it wasn't that serious, that whatever Simon felt for him was more of a fleeting attraction rather than genuine feelings. How could he deny that any further though, now that he knew Simon had been wanting him for six years? He felt awful now for the fact that he had gone to bed with Simon at all, let alone for the fact that he had freaked out about it afterwards and had suggested they forget it happened. He hadn't known how Simon felt about him though, and he certainly hadn't meant to lead him on.

He sighed, dropping his head into his hands as he attempted to figure out what the fuck he was supposed to do about this, "I told him we should forget that it even happened." 

"But you didn't know how he felt?" 

"No! We were drunk, I was high, I thought we'd just made a stupid drunken mistake." 

Roger was quiet then, and John was actually pretty grateful for that much. He just.. he didn't know what he was supposed to do, and he was pretty sure that any suggestions Roger had probably wouldn't have helped. 

"John, how do you feel about Simon?" Roger eventually asked, and honestly? That wasn't the question that he'd been expecting him to ask. It did raise the question though, because he knew that he loved Simon, but was that all there was to it? 

"I don't know." He admitted, "It's complicated."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"That I've never thought about him like that before, and that I definitely freaked out that morning. But I'm starting to think that maybe I shouldn't have, because I don't know what I feel now."

To his credit, Roger kept quiet and just waited for him to go on, "I've started noticing things." He finally admitted, "Things about him that I've never noticed before, y'know? Christ, I couldn't take my bloody eyes off him at the rehearsal the other day." He admitted with a slightly bitter huff of laughter. Fuck, why did this whole thing have to be so fucking complicated? He knew he had fucked up, so how was he now supposed to explain to Simon that maybe he did actually fancy him after all? 

"John, I think you and Simon need to talk. And I mean actually talk, rather than whatever I'm sure you did before. I know what you're both like, so don't even try to tell me that you've already talked it out." Roger eventually said with a small smile, "I can see that this is hurting you, and I'm sure it's hurting him too." 

"Yeah, I know. Thanks Rog." He said with a small smile of his own. 

  
-x-

  
Later that night as he lay in bed - long after Roger had left, and frustrated at the fact that he was still awake - he decided that, come hell or high water, he'd make things right with Simon over the next couple of days. 

Ignoring everything that had happened - the arguments and the confusion over everything - he tried to think about nothing other than how he actually felt about Simon. Sure, they were best friends, they had fallen into a fast friendship almost as soon as Simon had joined the band, but could it honestly be anything more than that? Knowing now that Simon did have feelings for him, he wondered if he genuinely could return those feelings. 

Could he happily wake up next to Simon every morning? 

Could he kiss him and actually mean it?

Could he see himself actually falling in love with him?

Christ, but he was pretty sure that he could. 

There was no doubt that he loved Simon, but the thought of actually falling in love with him didn't sound as daunting as he had once thought that it might. He already wanted Simon in his life for the rest of his life, so if he could have him there as a romantic partner rather than simply just a best friend? They had already been to bed together, he had already felt what it was like to kiss Simon, he had already seen how he looked as he came. 

Christ, he'd already had this once, and now he was aching for more. 

  
-x-

  
_"Yeah, that's why I've done it again."_

_"No-no-notorious."_ He sang with a grin into his own microphone, providing the backing lyrics along with Nick as Simon sang the closing lyrics to the song. 

Only halfway through the show, and he already couldn't deny the fact that things were already running far more smoothly than they had the last show that they had played. He could feel his shirt sticking to him, both it and his hair damp from the sweat - although this time it came from the exhilaration of the stage, rather than any drugs attempting to sweat their way out of his system. He'd considered it earlier, but he was determined to talk to Simon at some point or another throughout the night, and he wanted to be totally sober when that happened. A couple of drinks later wouldn't hurt, but he didn't want to be wired to the point of making no sense. 

"Thank you, London." Simon said with a grin into his own microphone, pushing a hand up through his hair as he turned back to the front of the stage. He was equally as worn-out looking as John felt, although the smile was bright on his face, "Always a joy. We're gonna take you on a trip to Rio for this next one." He told the audience, as the warbling tune of Nick's synths kicked in. 

_"You saw me standing by the wall, corner of a main street. And the lights are flashing on your windowsill."_

He smiled as he watched Simon sing, grateful for the slight drop in energy that came with _Save a Prayer_. He couldn't recall a time when he had ever told Simon, but he really did find his voice beautiful. He had that typical 'eighties' sounding voice, but it was songs like _Save a Prayer_ that really showcased just how haunting his voice could be. 

They hadn't really gotten much of a chance to speak earlier - an unspoken agreement between the band to kick things up a little at the rehearsal today, to avoid any mistakes that had come about during the last show - and so he had focused all of his attention on making sure that every note from his bass flowed naturally. Simon had smiled warmly at him before they had gotten to work though, and so he wasn't worried about any lingering bad blood between them. 

As he watched him now though, eyes closed while he poured his heart into the song, he couldn't help but notice just how beautiful the older man actually was. Obviously he'd noticed before, and he could appreciate that he was attractive, but this was the first time that he had looked at Simon and had honestly thought _'I could fall so in love with you'_. 

Later, he thought, they could talk later. 

He sidled up to Simon as he continued to sing, smile on his own face as he watched him. Simon eventually noticed him, and turned slightly to make room at his own microphone as they lead into the chorus.

_"Don't say a prayer for me now, save it 'til the morning after. No, don't say a prayer for me now. Save it 'til the morning after."_ They sang together, both leaning in towards the microphone. He knew that his voice had nothing on Simon's, but he liked the way that they sounded together - their voices harmonised well together. 

He leaned in to Simon, unable to quite hold back his smile when the older man slid his hand up into his hair to hold him there as they sang together. Closing his eyes, he smiled as their foreheads knocked together, the microphone between them. He could feel the butterflies curling in his stomach as a result of their proximity to each other, heightened even further when Simon leaned in and bumped their noses together. Christ, this was always how they had acted together when they were on stage, but he'd never felt this sort of electricity between them before. 

They were already breathing the same air, it would have been so easy to close the last of the distance between them and pull Simon into a hard kiss. He wouldn't do that though, he knew he couldn't, he wanted to talk to him first. 

Pulling away from him, Simon continued to sing, eyes still on him as he stepped backwards away from him, _"And you wanted to dance so I asked you to dance, but fear is in your soul. Some people call it a one night stand, but we can call it paradise."_

Swallowing thickly, he held Simon's gaze, teeth clamping down on his lower lip as he watched him. _But we can call it paradise._ They could, he knew they could, if only he hadn't been so stupid.

Thankfully, _Hungry Like the Wolf_ was up next, so they could kick the energy up again while he bounded back to his own corner of the stage. The last five minutes had made him painfully aware of the fact that, yeah, fuck, he did want Simon, but he was feeling a little bit.. raw, almost. He was pretty sure that his emotions had been written all over his face, and he was just feeling a little bit exposed was all.

The frustrating thing though, was that he really couldn't tell what was going through Simon's head at the moment. He was pretty sure how he was feeling had been obvious - the want and the realisation clear on his face - but he'd gotten nothing back from the older man. Obviously he knew how Simon felt about him, but he couldn't tell if he had realised that maybe his feelings were returned, or what he was thinking if he had picked up on it. 

He managed to get through the rest of their performance without doing anything dramatic such as dropping to his knees then and there in front of Simon - he knew the audience probably would have lapped it up, but he couldn't see Simon being amused. By the time they walked off the stage after the encore, he was drenched in sweat, his heart pounding from the adrenaline rush of a fantastic show. This was what the last show should have been, rather than the disaster that it had ended up being.

He had just handed his bass off and had grabbed a towel to wipe his face with, when Simon collided with him from behind, causing him to stumble forward a step or two. 

"Bloody hell, we blew the roof off tonight." He beamed, throwing an arm around John's neck. 

"Yeah, we did alright." He teased, laughing when Simon playfully pushed him. Shit, this was what he missed between them - the easy banter, the lighthearted teasing. Surely something that could only be improved on by pulling Simon into a kiss.

"You're coming out with us tonight, yeah?" Simon asked as they walked, although he never drifted too far away from him.

"Yeah, course. I just need to do something about this first." He said with a huff of laughter, dragging a hand through his hair. He had a lot of hair, it could be a bit inconvenient at times like this. Still, he didn't miss the fond way that Simon smiled at him either.

The trip back to the hotel thankfully didn't take too long, and they agreed to meet back down at the lobby in forty-five minutes once they had showered and made themselves presentable for the rest of the night. 

He didn't spend too long in the shower once he had gotten back to his own room, but if he was being honest, he had sort of been running on autopilot. His mind was slightly distracted, attempting to figure out what the fuck he was going to say to Simon once he got him alone. Then there was the issue of trying to figure out when to try and talk to him. Maybe later on tonight, but he didn't want to have this conversation if either of them got so drunk that they fucked it up. 

He was nervous, he could admit to that much, and he was trying to ignore the fact that there was a small bag of white powder in his bag. Not tonight. Simon had always been able to tell when he was on something other than booze, and he couldn't bear to see the disapproval on his face when he was trying to admit his feelings to him. He couldn't risk the fact that Simon might not believe him.

As if his thoughts were being answered, there was a knock on his door, and he paused in where he was searching for his hairspray in his bag. He was sure he'd packed it. He straightened up and crossed the room to the door, smiling when he found Simon on the other side of it, "Hey, what are you doing here?" He asked, stepping aside to let him in. 

"I was ready early. Nick is still doing his makeup, so he told me to come bother you instead." He said with a smile, as he stepped around him and into the room, where he deposited himself diagonally across the bed, propped up on an elbow, "What's taking you so long?"

"Can't find my bloody hairspray. I thought I'd packed it, must have left it at home." He explained as he turned his attention back to his bag. 

"Leave it, your hair looks nice with nothing in it." 

He glanced up then, meeting Simon's slightly shy smile with one of his own. Christ, but why did Simon have to be so sweet? 

"Hey, look." He started as he stood back up, trailing over to sit on the corner of the bed, "Now that I've got you for a moment, could we talk?" He asked, smoothing down a corner of the bedspread that had been rumpled. 

"Yeah, course. About what?"

"Us." 

He didn't particularly like the way that Simon seemed to shut down slightly at that, biting down on his lower lip as he dropped his gaze, "Is this where you tell me that you don't think we can work together anymore?" He asked. 

"What? No." He insisted, shaking his head. He was very surprised by that actually, obviously things had been a little off between them over the last couple of days, but he wasn't about to let this ultimately ruin Duran Duran, "I know it's probably a stupid question, asking why you never said anything. But why didn't you? I spoke to Roger last week and he told me everything. Six years, Charley?" 

Simon just looked at him for a moment, before shrugging, "I couldn't, Johnny, I couldn't risk fucking the band up. Everything was so new, and I had no idea how you'd take it. I wasn't going to risk having you take off on the band."

"But that night?" He asked softly, moving over slightly closer, so that he wasn't quite as on the edge of the bed. 

"That night, we were drunk. We didn't talk about it, and I thought.. I thought it was you finally admitting you felt the same way." Simon explained, looking more at a loose thread on the bedspread that he was picking at rather than at John, "So when you woke up that morning, and you didn't even know it was me that you'd gone to bed with, and then you took off like that.. I felt like I'd taken advantage of you. I felt awful." 

He swallowed thickly, trying his best to wrap his head around what he was hearing. Fuck, he'd never meant to make Simon feel like that. He'd never for a second thought that sleeping with Simon that night had been him leading him on in any way, "Shit, Charley. I'm sorry, I didn't know." 

"I know you didn't. But can you understand why I never said anything? I mean, what would you have said if it was the other way around?" 

"I'm still trying to figure that out." He admitted with a soft huff of breath, "What should I say?" 

"What?" 

He turned over so that he was mirroring Simon's position, propped up on his own elbow and facing him, "Tell me what I should say, Charley. I'm trying to tell you that I can't stop thinking about that night, or about you, or about how fucking stupid I was to miss what's right in front of me." 

Simon just looked at him, although he wasn't really expecting much else of a reaction. After all, he hadn't spoken to Simon about how he was feeling before now. To the older man, this was probably coming out of nowhere, "Have you been drinking?" He eventually asked, the uncertainty clear on his face. 

"No, stone cold sober. No drugs, no booze." 

Simon still didn't look all too convinced though, and he knew he couldn't blame him for that. Less than two weeks ago, he was hightailing it out of that hotel room and insisting that they forget they had ever slept together. If it were the other way around, he knew that he'd be more than a little skeptical too. 

"Don't say anything you don't mean, Johnny." Simon eventually said quietly, looking down at the space between them on the bed.

"I mean it, Charley, every word." 

Simon glanced back up at him after a moment, although he didn't miss the way that his eyes flicked down to his mouth for a split second. At that, he couldn't resist leaning in to press their lips together in a kiss. 

For a moment, Simon didn't respond, and he briefly worried that he had completely misread the situation and how Simon felt about it. Just as he was about to pull back and apologise though, Simon reached up to cup his cheek in his hand, tilting his head into the kiss. 

He could feel his heart hammering in his chest as they kissed, unable to quite hold back the smile when Simon slid his hand up from his cheek into his hair, running his fingers through the strands. God, how many times had he and Simon playfully kissed before? Then there was obviously the night that they had been drunk, and when Simon had kissed him after the show the other night, he'd been too taken aback to even do anything about it. Now though, as he draped his arm over Simon's waist to pull him closer, he couldn't help but wonder why it had taken them so long to get here. 

Chancing his luck, he shifted a little so that he could push Simon down onto his back, bracing himself above him on his elbows as he leaned down to kiss him again. He groaned low in his throat at the feeling of Simon scraping his fingers down his back over his shirt, their tongues sliding together. 

At the sound of a knock on the door, they sprang away from each other as though they were caught doing something they shouldn't have been, the sounds of their harsh breathing the only other sound in the room as they stared at each other.

The shock didn't last long though, and Simon's face softened as he reached out to brush his fringe back from his face, "Come on, it's probably the others." He said with a small smile, turning his head slightly to press a quick kiss to the palm of his hand. 

He went to open the door once he had climbed off the bed, finding Nick waiting out in the hallway, "About time, we've been waiting down in the lobby for you two." He pointed out.

A quick glance at his watch told him that Nick was right, they should have been down in the lobby ten minutes ago. 

"Sorry, yeah, we're coming now." He said with a nod, patting down his pockets to make sure that he had his room key and his box of cigarettes, "Come on, Charley." 

He couldn't help but notice Nick's perfectly arched eyebrow as Simon walked out past him, although he thankfully held back from making any comments. He wasn't exactly sure what to call this thing between himself and Simon just yet - just because they had kissed didn't mean that everything was suddenly sorted out, and so he sort of wanted to avoid talking about it to the others just yet.

"Ah, shit, I left my wallet in my room. You two go on, I'll follow you down." Simon said once they were halfway down the hall, spinning on his heel to go back to his room. 

With a shrug, he glanced at Nick before walking on with him.

"Is everything alright with you two?" Nick eventually asked as they walked, glancing up at John, "You seem like you're on better terms with each other." 

"Yeah, I think so. We've talked, I think we're starting to sort things out."

"How so?"

"I don't know just yet, but it's better." 

He willed for Nick to just take it at that without asking for any further information. Right now, he wanted to keep it close to his chest. Like he'd said, just because he and Simon had kissed didn't mean that they were about to announce to the world that they were suddenly together. Maybe nothing further would happen, maybe they'd agree to stay just friends despite their feelings for each other. He wasn't sure what the outcome of this was going to be yet, and so he wanted to avoid sharing all of the details just yet. 

To his relief, Nick just hummed, nudging him gently with his elbow, "Good, I'm glad you children have sorted things out." He teased with a small smile. 

"Yeah, well." He huffed as he playfully pushed him back, laughing when he stumbled a couple of steps. 

  
-x-

  
By the time they got to the club, he had to admit that he was finally feeling better about the whole thing. The first couple of times that they had 'talked', he'd figured that they could just forget about it and have everything go back to how it had been between them before. 

He didn't particularly like to talk about his feelings, he had never liked that, but now that he had finally bitten the bullet and talked to Simon about how he was feeling, he couldn't help but hope that things would finally turn around for them. 

He had to admit though, he could feel the nervous energy thrumming through him as he watched Simon from across the bar, nursing his rum and coke. The liquor was growing warm in the glass, but he was trying his best to make it last rather than putting away glass after glass. He wasn't sure where tonight was going to end, whether he and Simon would end up going back to separate rooms or whether they'd spend the night together, and so he didn't want to get so drunk that he needed to be carried back to his room at the end of the night. The last thing he wanted was to fuck this up.

As he watched Simon from across the bar though, he couldn't deny that he was excited to see where this thing between them went. The older man looked gorgeous, tall and slender in his sand coloured suit and blue shirt - which was a total contrast to the white shirt and black leather trousers that he was wearing. It looked good on him though, he'd always thought that soft neutral colours suited Simon better. He was halfway through a glass of wine, but Simon had always been a little better at managing his alcohol than he was, and so he didn't worry about it. 

"You're distracted." 

He glanced over to find Nick next to him, glass of red wine in his own hand, "What? I'm not distracted." He insisted, swirling the contents of his glass around. 

"Yes, you are. By now, you'd usually be entertaining the ladies, and instead I find you brooding with a warm, flat glass of booze. What's going on?" Nick asked, although he was smiling.

"Nothing, just don't want to get drunk tonight is all." He explained, laughing when Nick raised an eyebrow at him. Alright, he had deserved that, it was a rare occurrence that he'd decide to take it easy on a night out like this. Still, he wasn't about to fuck this up, and he had to admit that he was proud of himself - he'd been offered coke twice already tonight, and he had turned it down both times. Usually he wouldn't have thought twice, but like he'd said, he didn't want Simon to be turned off the idea of spending the rest of the night with him if he knew that he'd taken anything. He knew that he could have snuck off to do it and Simon probably would have been none the wiser, but he wouldn't feel right about doing that. 

"Alright, well don't sit here like a wet cloth all night either." Nick teased. 

"Piss off." He said with a grin, grimacing as he drained the last of his drink. Alright, like Nick had said, it was warm and flat, "I'm going to get another, d'you want anything?"

"No, go on. I'll find you later." Nick said, with a quick squeeze to his forearm before trailing back off. 

He turned back to the bar, leaning up slightly once he had caught the bartender's attention so that he could hear him over the music, "Just a rum and coke, mate, thanks." He said with a nod. Like he had just told Nick, he wasn't planning on getting overly drunk, but a couple more drinks to soothe the nerves couldn't hurt. He knew how Simon felt about him, but he couldn't quite deny the fact that he was nervous to see where the rest of the night took them. 

He took a sip of his drink once the bartender had passed it over, although he glanced over when a girl approached him and leaned against the bar next to him, "It's John Taylor, right? Thought I recognised your face." 

"That's me, yeah." He said with a small smile, leaning back against the bar. She was pretty - he'd have to have been totally blind not to see that - but finding some pretty girl to hook up with tonight hadn't been anywhere near his to-do list for the night. The only person he intended on spending the night with was Simon, and he wasn't about to change his mind on that. 

"Would you like to wait while I get a drink, and we could find somewhere a little quieter to talk?" She suggested.

Usually, he wouldn't have thought twice. Like he'd said, she was pretty, and she wasn't exactly playing hard to get. He'd never had to work too hard for female attention, a wink and a smile from across the bar was usually enough to ensure that he had company for the night. But, like he'd said, he already had plans for the night. So he just shook his head, giving her a slightly sheepish smile, "Not tonight, love, sorry." 

He could tell that she was surprised, but thankfully she only shrugged it off before moving on down the bar to order her drink. 

When he glanced back up, it was to find Simon watching him, obviously having noticed him speaking to the girl. He wasn't quite sure what he must have been thinking, and he wondered whether he thought that he was going to leave with her or not. He wouldn't have done that though. It wasn't completely unheard of him to pull a dick move now and again, but he certainly wouldn't have pulled that shit after talking to Simon about what they had earlier. So he simply smiled and flashed him a quick wink, before beckoning him over with a nod of his head.

Simon trailed over to him, smiling as he hip-checked him once he had reached him, "Who was your friend?" He asked.

"Don't know, she wanted to go somewhere else to 'talk'." 

"And you didn't take her up on that offer?"

When he glanced back at Simon, it was to find him looking casually disinterested. He could see right through that though, he'd known Simon far too long to buy into that act. It wasn't hard to see that he was only attempting to seem disinterested for fear of what John would say. So he smiled and rolled his eyes, discreetly reaching out to wrap his fingers around Simon's wrist, "No, course not. There's somebody else I'd rather spend the night with." 

Well, there it was. He wasn't sure if Simon had intended for them to spend the night together, but at least he knew now that John didn't plan on going home with anybody else. 

Simon cracked a small smile, ducking his head slightly, "That so?" 

"Yeah. I mean, provided he's interested, of course." He said softly, stroking his thumb gently over the bone in Simon's wrist.

Simon twisted his hand around then to link his fingers through John's, their hands still hidden out of sight with the way they were standing next to the bar, "He's interested, don't worry about that."

He grinned as he leaned in close to him, although they were interrupted when Warren bounded up to them, draping an arm around Simon's neck, "Oi, remember that bloke from the production company I was telling you about last week? He's here, he wants to talk to you." 

Simon glanced at him, although he smiled and rolled his eyes, "Go on, I'll catch you later." He told him. 

"Alright, come find me before you leave." 

"I will, go on." 

He smiled as he leaned back against the bar, watching Simon walking off with Warren. Okay, so he was glad that he had mentioned that he'd like for he and Simon to spend the rest of the night together once they had left the club, because he certainly didn't want to assume. Obviously they had kissed earlier - and he wasn't sure how much further it would have gone if Nick hadn't interrupted him - but he knew that there was no guarantee that Simon would want to come back to his room later, or vice versa.

He kept a pretty low profile for the rest of the night, mingling just enough so that he wouldn't be accused of brooding like Nick had thought so earlier. He knew he probably would have been more fun if he was drunk, or if he'd accepted one of the multiple offers of drugs that he'd already received, but he wasn't going to give in and say 'a little bit won't hurt'. 

Still, he was having a good night. He'd teased Nick when he'd found him talking some girl until the younger man had eventually asked him to piss off, he'd had a couple more drinks with Warren and Steve, he'd gotten talking to these two girls who were starting up a band of their own - although he only realised afterwards that they had never actually told him the name of the band. Still, they sounded like they'd had big plans. 

He stepped outside for a quick cigarette break then, leaning back against the wall of the club next to the door. It was pretty deserted outside, actually, but he supposed it was late enough - people had probably already decided what club they were spending the night in by now, that or they had gone home. 

He was tired, but he could feel the energy running through his veins, feel the thumping bass of the music inside in his ears. It was a good feeling, he was pretty sure that he'd never get tired of feeling the thump of a bass line in his chest. 

Closing his eyes as he exhaled the smoke from his cigarette, he was snapped out of his thoughts by the light touch of a hand against his hip. 

He was half expecting it to be one of the several girls he'd spoken to inside the club throughout the night, although when he opened his eyes, he was surprised to find that it was Simon, "Alright?" He said with a small smile. 

"Saw you sneaking out, thought I'd come catch you." 

He smiled, flicking his cigarette away before reaching out to loop his fingers through the belt loops of Simon's trousers, pulling him closer. He still couldn't quite wrap his head around the fact that he was able to do this without thinking twice about it.

"We're in public." Simon reminded him, although there was a hint of a grin playing on his lips. 

"We were in public when you kissed me last time too, didn't stop you then."

"Pretty sure you kissed me." 

"He said, she said." He teased with a grin, letting go of Simon's belt loops so that he could settle his hands on his waist instead, "Does it bother you?" 

"No, just thought it might bother you." Simon said softly, brushing his thumb gently against John's chin before cupping his jaw properly in his hand.

He smiled then as Simon leaned in to kiss him, his eyes sliding shut as he draped his arms properly around Simon's waist. That first night between them had been, well.. messy, was one way of putting it. The aftermath of it had been messy anyway. As for the night itself, he'd never imagined that kissing Simon would make the heat and the want curl in his stomach in the way that it did. However, kissing Simon sober - or mostly sober, anyway - was something that he hadn't been prepared for at all. The older man was thorough and attentive as he flicked his tongue into John's mouth, tilting the bassist's head slightly into the kiss for a better angle. Christ, but he could have stayed here all night, relearning the taste and texture of Simon's mouth. 

Eventually though, the fact that they were in public did sort of get to him. Like he'd just told Simon, he didn't mind people knowing eventually, but he knew that being caught out here with their tongues down each others throats by somebody with a camera was the last thing either of them needed. 

He pulled away slightly, gently nudging their noses together, "Are you going back inside, or d'you want to get out of here?" 

"D'you need to get anything from inside?"

"Nope."

"Then let's go." 

As Simon stepped away from him, he couldn't help but smile as the older man reached down to take his hand as they walked. He was pointedly avoiding catching his eye, but he could see the way Simon couldn't quite hold back his own smile either. Christ, but he should have known that Simon would be an old romantic.

The walk back to their hotel didn't take them long, and had they not talked earlier about where John was planning to spend the night, he might have hesitated in following Simon up to his room once they head reached the hotel. As it stood though, he didn't bother with the tentative 'I can go back to my own room' shtick. He knew what he wanted, and he knew what Simon wanted, so why was there any point of pretending otherwise? 

Once Simon had shut the door behind them though, he could feel the nerves starting to kick back up. 

He wasn't afraid of sex, and he certainly had no reservations about casual sex with people whose names he hardly knew, but he just.. this was different. It was Simon, it wasn't some random hook up. It wasn't a messy, drunken one night stand either, not this time. So he was pretty sure that he couldn't be blamed for being a little nervous.

Still, he'd thought that he was hiding it well, but when he turned back to Simon, it was to find the older man watching him with a slightly hesitant expression, "Are you alright?" He asked. 

"Yeah, course." He said with a nod, shoving his hands into his coat pockets. 

Simon didn't look convinced though, and he sighed as he scratched at the back of his head, "You look as though you're about to turn tail and run." 

"I'm not, I promise. I just.. I'm nervous." He admitted, huffing softly. He felt sort of stupid for admitting that, but what else could he say? He didn't want Simon thinking that he'd changed his mind here. 

Simon just looked at him for a moment, before crossing the room to him and dropping his hands on his hips, "What for? It's just me." 

"Exactly. It's you, it's not some stranger. It matters this time." He said softly, resting his own hands on Simon's chest. That was it really. He wouldn't have had a problem if it had been some stranger that he'd never see again, but this was the beginning of something here. It was important this time. 

Simon's face softened at that, and he slid his hands around his waist properly as he leaned in to kiss him. 

For a moment, he just let himself get lost in the feel of Simon's mouth moving against his own, and he slid his hands around to the back of Simon's head to hold him steady while they kissed.

Obviously sex was great, but he was just as fond of kissing - especially the sort of long, slow kisses that would turn his knees to jelly. It was certainly different to kiss somebody with an obviously masculine frame, somebody that was exactly the same height as him, but it wasn't a bad difference. It was just that; different. The fact that it was Simon too instead of just any bloke just made it all the more pleasurable. 

They had been stood in the middle of the room while they kissed, and he barely even realised that they were moving until he came to rest with his back against the wall, his body bracketed in against the wall by Simon's body. Fuck, but it felt good to have Simon pressed up against him like that. He moved his hands down from where they'd been resting at the back of Simon's neck, as he slowly began to undo the buttons on the older man's shirt. 

"Wait." Simon stopped him, still close enough that his breath huffed out softly against his mouth, "Just.. promise me first that you won't push me away in the morning. I can't deal with going through all of this again." 

"I promise." He said softly, leaning forward to brush his lips gently against Simon's again. To his surprise though, Simon didn't immediately respond to the kiss, but he could tell that he just wasn't completely convinced yet. He supposed he couldn't really blame him there though, after the last time.

"Charley, I want this. I want you." He murmured, brushing his thumb gently against Simon's cheek, "I mean it. If I didn't, I wouldn't do this." He whispered, leaning forward to kiss him properly again. 

"Or this." He leaned down to press his mouth to Simon's neck, scraping his teeth gently against the tender skin. 

"Or this." He slid his hands down over Simon's arse and squeezed, using his grip to pull their bodies together. Inwardly, he delighted at the way Simon's breath hitched as they were pressed together. 

"Alright, alright. Point taken." Simon huffed, although there was a grin on his lips as he threaded his fingers through John's hair. He smiled when John leaned into the touch, and there was a softness in his eyes that he really hadn't expected to see. Obviously he knew how Simon felt about him - both Simon and Roger had already confirmed that fact - but knowing about it in theory, and seeing the open affection on Simon's face were two very different things. He wasn't sure how he had missed this before. 

"Can I?" He asked, moving his hands back up to the front of Simon's shirt, where he had already opened two of the buttons. 

Simon nodded, and so he continued to undo the buttons of his shirt until he could push the fabric down over his shoulders, leaning down to press his lips to the bare skin of his shoulder once he'd dropped the shirt to the ground. As he trailed his mouth along exposed skin, he couldn't help but think of how long they could have been doing this if he had only known how Simon had felt. Six years, and he was only finding out now. Still, had Simon come to him six years ago and had admitted how he felt, he couldn't say for sure how he would have reacted. He'd been barely twenty years old then, perpetually excited by the fame and the women throwing themselves at them. If he was being honest, knowing back then that Simon had feelings for him probably would have frightened him off. He certainly wouldn't have been ready back then for anything serious with him. Still, he was ready now, he wanted this. 

He smoothed his hands down Simon's chest and over his stomach until he reached his trousers, hands fumbling with the buckle of his belt as Simon pulled him back up by the hair and pressed their lips together, "Come on, bed." He breathed against his mouth as he undid his belt, pulling it loose from his trousers. 

He moved with Simon when he stepped back away from the wall, letting the older man steer them back towards the bed as he unbuttoned his shirt and dropped it behind them somewhere. Once they reached the bed though, he was caught slightly off guard when Simon pushed him down onto the bed, and he couldn't help the slightly breathless huff of laughter that slipped out as he landed. Alright, well, he had absolutely no problems with Simon taking the reigns here, he just hadn't expected it. 

To his surprise though, rather than joining him on the bed, Simon sank to his knees at the edge of the bed. Propping himself up on an elbow, he swallowed thickly as Simon settled on the floor between his legs, already undoing his belt and pulling it free from his trousers, "Fuck, Charley, are you sure?" He asked, lifting his hips slightly to allow Simon to pull his trousers off once he'd gotten them undone. 

"Yeah, I'm sure." Simon murmured, leaning into John's touch when he ran his fingers through his hair. 

"Have you ever done this before?" 

Simon glanced away from him then, biting down on his lower lip, "No. I want this, though." He said softly. 

He cupped Simon's jaw in his hand then, pulling him back up to him as he sat up so that he could press their lips together in a kiss, "So do I." He whispered, giving him a small smile. He certainly wasn't saying no, he was just.. surprised, was all. He vaguely remembered Simon saying that he'd never been with a man either the first time that they had slept together, but he had sort of wondered how much ground that statement had covered. Considering he'd been in acceptance of his feelings for John for six years, he was pretty sure he couldn't have been blamed for wondering if he had experimented with other men in all that time. To find out that he was the first, it just added another layer of importance to this whole thing. 

He smiled into the kiss as he ran his fingers through Simon's hair, although he laughed when the older man broke the kiss and pushed him back down against the mattress.

"Stop fidgeting." Simon told him, a grin on his own lips as he looked up at him. He turned his attention back to the task at hand then, leaning back down to first press his mouth to John's hipbone.

Considering the fact that they had both been drunk last time, and that it had pretty much been a frantic fumble in the sheets, he hadn't quite been sure what to expect now that they had both slowed down and sobered up, but fuck.. he hadn't been prepared for the possibility that Simon would be such a fucking tease. 

He had expected him to just get straight to it, and honestly? Since Simon had just admitted that he'd never sucked a cock before, he hadn't really expected much from the experience. Surprisingly though, the older man took his time in teasing him - slowly working marks into the thin skin over his hipbones, scraping his nails gently down the length of his thighs, breathing hotly over the shape of his cock before he'd even stripped him out of his boxers, "Please, Charley." He sighed as he dragged his fingers through Simon's hair, distracting him from where he'd been sucking a mark into the tender skin of his inner thigh. 

"Please what?" Simon asked, the picture of innocence with his wide blue eyes, despite the fact that he was finally stripping him out of his boxers to free his hard cock. 

"You're really going to make me beg?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." Simon shrugged, although his grin turned slightly dirtier as he leaned down to drag his tongue up the length of his cock, holding his gaze the entire time. 

He sighed, dropping his head back against the bedspread, "Christ, come on, Charley."

He heard Simon huff out a soft breath of laughter, although he didn't have time to complain any further about the teasing before he eventually gave in and wrapped his lips around his cock. Christ, Simon's mouth was warm and wet, his tongue moving along the underside of his cock as he worked his way down. The pace that they were moving at could have been considered glacial, but he didn't want to rock his hips up and end up choking Simon, considering he was very much testing the waters here with how much he could take. He slowly bobbed his head up and down the length of his cock until he seemed to have reached all he could take, one hand wrapped around the base of his cock, the other pressed onto his hip to hold him down. 

"Fuck." He breathed, his eyes sliding shut. The feeling of Simon's fingers pressed hard into his hip as well as the wet warmth of his mouth sliding up and down his cock had the pleasure shooting up his spine, and a moan was torn from his throat when he felt Simon swallow around his cock. Had he known how good Simon would be at this, he would have jumped at the opportunity a lot sooner. 

Pulling back, Simon sucked hard at the head of his cock for a moment, before slowly sliding back down as far as he could go, and he moaned as he dragged a hand through the older man's hair, "Stop.. stop, I- come here." He gritted out as he pushed himself back up onto an elbow, tugging gently on Simon's hair to coax him back up. 

For a moment, Simon looked slightly confused, although he went easily with it to settle on top of John as he pulled him back up to him, "What's the matter?" He asked, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear. 

"Nothing, I just don't want this to be over until you're fucking me." He breathed, arching up slightly so that he could kiss him again as he fumbled with the material of Simon's trousers until he could push them down his hips. 

Simon moaned against his lips, the fabric of his trousers getting caught between them as he rocked down against him, "Fuck, you want that?" He asked, teeth gently tugging on John's lower lip. 

"Yeah. I want you, Charley." He whispered, cupping Simon's face between his hands as he kissed him again. This hadn't exactly been in the plan, but fuck.. he really couldn't deny that this was what he wanted. He'd never been fucked before though, and so he understood that a little bit of preparation was needed first. Still, he could admit that he was slightly nervous, but it was simply because of his lack of experience in this area, and it certainly wasn't enough to change his mind. 

Simon threaded his fingers through his hair as he kissed him, before pulling back slightly, "Alright, one second." He murmured, sliding off the bed so that he could cross the room to rummage through his bag - presumably to search for condoms and lube. His trousers were still hanging loosely around his hips, the flush high on his cheeks from arousal, his hair tousled from John running his fingers through it. Shit, yeah, he was pretty sure that this was a sight he was never going to get tired of. 

As he watched Simon - admiring the slope of his bare shoulders - he wrapped his fingers around his own cock, his breath hitching as he slowly stroked himself. 

"Bloody hell."

He opened his eyes when Simon spoke, biting down on his lower lip as he looked over at him. Simon had one knee resting on the bed with the other foot still planted on the ground, bottle of lube and condom in one hand, his gaze hot as he watched him, "Christ, Johnny, you're beautiful." 

He grinned, propping himself up on his elbows, "Get over here." 

Simon finally stripped out of his trousers and boxers before joining him on the bed, slowly crawling up the length of the bed until he had reached him. How had he never noticed before that there was something undeniably sexy about Simon, with his lean body and the way that he lithely moved. Obviously he'd noticed, but not in the way that made the want curl low in his stomach like it currently was. There was a hell of a difference between acknowledging the fact that his best friend was attractive as he watched him grinding all over a microphone stand, and wanting to be the thing that he was grinding all over. 

"What?" Simon asked as he hovered over him, hint of a grin on his face. 

"Nothing." He murmured, smile innocent as ever as he draped his arms around Simon's waist, brushing his fingers gently over the dip in the small of his back. It was actually pretty gratifying to feel Simon shiver in response to his touch, feel the goosebumps rising on his skin wherever he lightly brushed his fingers, "Just thinking that you're kind of sexy." 

"Really? We're naked, about to fuck, and the best you can come up with is 'kind of sexy'?" Simon asked, apparently attempting to sound put out, although he was smiling as he gently knocked their foreheads together. 

He rolled his eyes, smiling as he cupped his hands around Simon's jaw, thumbs brushing his cheekbones, "Fine. You're incredibly sexy, and I've totally got the hot's for you. Better?"

"It'll do." Simon teased, ducking down to press their lips together in a brief but dirty kiss, "Are you sure about this?"

"Yeah, of course." 

Simon smiled then, before sitting back a little to give himself room to work as he reached for the bottle of lube, "Just relax, alright?"

He could admit that he could feel the nerves prickling up again as he watched Simon opening the bottle with a click, before pouring some of the lube over his fingers. Really though, he knew he had no reason to be nervous. He'd never even done this much before - having never felt the need to experiment with himself, or been with a girl who had wanted to try this - but he knew that he could trust Simon. He trusted him to take it easy, and to stop if he either wasn't into it or if he was hurting him. 

He let Simon settle in between his legs, closing his eyes at the first touch of a lube wet finger pressing into him. It wasn't painful, it was just.. an odd sensation, a little uncomfortable, but nothing that he couldn't manage. 

"Relax, love." Simon whispered as he pressed soft kisses along the length of his jaw, nipping gently at the shell of his ear. 

He could only nod, a soft moan slipping out as Simon continued to work his finger in and out of him. 

Considering he had been pretty nervous about this, he couldn't help but be relieved that Simon clearly wasn't in a rush here. He took his time in preparing him, only adding a second finger and then a third once he was sure that he could take it, and using plenty of lube in the process. He didn't mind though, sex was always a little bit wet and messy. 

He dropped his head back against the pillow, closing his eyes as Simon continued to work his fingers into him. It still felt like a stretch, but the burn wasn't quite as unbearable as he had thought that it would be. Still, he had never done this before, so he was prepared for it to hurt a little. He knew it wouldn't last, people wouldn't do this if it was nothing but pain, and so he just tried his best to relax. It helped that Simon was doing his best to distract him by trailing his mouth along his neck, leaving tender marks wherever he pressed his lips. 

"Charley, come on, I'm ready." He murmured, pressing his fingers down where his hand was on Simon's shoulder. 

"You sure?" Simon asked, "I don't want to hurt you."

"Yeah, I'm sure." He insisted, pulling him back up to press their lips together in a messy kiss. He was glad that Simon sounded as breathless as he felt though. He wanted the older man to be just as turned on as he currently was. 

Thankfully, Simon nodded, brushing their lips together again as he pulled his fingers out, "Alright, hang on." He whispered, biting his lip gently as he sat back. He reached back for where he had dropped the condom earlier, sitting back on his hunches as he tore the foil wrapper open. The flush was high on his cheeks, and it was impossible to miss the way his hands were shaking as he rolled the condom down onto his own cock. Fucking hell, he was glad that he had held back on the drinks tonight, he wanted to commit every moment of this to memory - not like the last time when he had had to piece the night together the next morning. 

He coaxed Simon back up to him once he was ready, letting the older man pull his legs up over his thighs so that he could settle between his legs. Another position probably would have been easier for the first time - him on top, or on all fours with Simon behind him - but he wanted to feel the weight of Simon on top of him, wanted to be able to kiss him. 

"Are you sure about this?" Simon asked as he lined his cock up, nudging their noses together. 

"Yeah, come on." He whispered, brushing his thumb against Simon's cheekbone. 

He closed his eyes as Simon began to press in, dropping his head back against the pillow with a soft moan. Obviously Simon had done a good job of preparing him, and he certainly hadn't been stingy with the lube, but his cock was a hell of a lot thicker than three fingers, and he was feeling the stretch of it now. 

It must have shown on his face, because Simon leaned down to brush his lips against his cheek after a moment, his fingers gently squeezing his hip, "Relax, love, let me in." He murmured, voice strained. He imagined it was probably hard for Simon to keep the pace as glacial as it was, instincts probably encouraging him to keep going, to just fuck into John's body.

"Yeah.. just, give me a minute." He murmured, dragging his fingers through Simon's hair again. He was fine, he didn't want to stop, he just needed a moment, "Come here." He whispered, pulling him down into another kiss. The feeling of Simon's mouth moving against his own, the feeling of his tongue in his mouth, it was enough to distract him from the burn as Simon began to slowly work his cock back in, before pulling out just enough to get a rhythm going. 

"Is this alright?" Simon asked as he smoothed John's hair back from his face, slowly rocking his hips. 

He could only nod, leaning up to press his forehead against Simon's. 

It didn't take them long to fall into a rhythm that they were both comfortable with, and he hitched his legs a little further up around Simon's hips as they moved together. Fuck, but it felt so good, and even the sound of Simon's harsh breathing was enough to send pleasure shooting up through his spine. Simon fucked like he moved - all long, lithe movements, hands smoothing over his skin, up into his hair. 

"Christ, wanted this for so long." Simon gasped, a soft moan slipping out. He slid a hand up into John's hair and gently pulled his head back to expose his throat, leaning down to press his mouth to his pulse point as he continued to thrust his hips. 

He could only moan in response, scraping his fingers down the length of Simon's back, "Sorry, sorry." He gritted out when he heard Simon's hiss, realising that he must have scratched him. 

Their bodies moved together, and it was all he could do to hold on for the ride. The weight of Simon on top of him and inside him, panting into his ear, the warm wetness of his mouth as he dragged against his neck - he wasn't sure how he was supposed to make himself last when every movement was sending sparks up his nervous system. 

"Hold on, let me-" Simon started, stilling his movements slightly as he dropped a hand down to pull John's leg a little further up around his hips. 

He didn't offer any resistance, hitching his legs up properly around Simon's waist as the older man began to move again. He could feel the change in angle though, and he half wondered for the reasoning behind it, until Simon thrusted into him in a way that made him see stars, and he gasped as he dropped his head back against the pillow, "Fucking.. _Christ, Charley,_ do that again." He whined, hand fisted in Simon's blonde hair. 

Simon did his best to keep fucking into him at that angle, sliding an arm underneath him when he arched his back to hold him up against him as he kept up the brutal pace, John's knees tight either side of his hips. 

Whatever careful reservations either of them had had at the beginning was well and truly lost now as they moved together, and he pulled Simon down to press their mouths together in a fierce kiss, "I can't.. Charley, I'm-" He gasped, barely able to do much more than pant into the older man's mouth at this point. He was so close, teetering right on the edge, and Simon was pushing him closer and closer. 

"I know, I know, me too." Simon sighed, his body shaking under John's touch. 

After a moment, Simon dropped a hand down to close his fingers around John's cock, stroking him in time with his thrusts - and that was all it took to push him over the edge. 

He arched his back as he came over Simon's fingers, dropping his head back with a cry. He clutched at Simon's shoulders, and he knew that the way he was digging his fingers into the bare skin must have been painful, but Simon only dropped his forehead against his shoulder with a low moan of his own, "That's it, yeah.. fuck, so beautiful." He groaned, turning his head slightly to pant against the side of his neck. 

Through the ecstasy of his orgasm, he could feel Simon's body trembling under his touch, and so he coaxed him to start moving again, "Come on, Charley, your turn.. please." He breathed, pulling him back down into a kiss. 

It didn't take long until they were simply panting into each others' mouths, and eventually Simon stilled with a shudder, a hoarse moan slipping out as his own orgasm washed over him. 

For a moment, neither of them moved as they came back down from their high, the sound of their breathing the only sound in the otherwise quiet room. Eventually though, he dropped a hand down to smooth through the hair at the nape of Simon's neck, smiling when the older man raised his head to look at him, "Fuck." He said with a small smile, rolling his eyes when Simon huffed out a soft breath of laughter. 

"Fuck, indeed." Simon teased, leaning up to press a quick kiss to his forehead before moving back. He pulled out, drawing a quiet hiss from them both, before sliding to the edge of the bed to toss the condom into the waste paper basket. 

He smiled as he watched him, taking note of the flush that had spread down over his chest, the way the sweat had pooled in the dip of his lower back. From this angle though, he could see the scratches down his back, and he felt an odd sense of pride at the fact that he was the one who had left them there. Sliding up to him, he kneeled up so that he could wrap his arms around Simon's chest from behind, ducking his head down to press his mouth to one of the scratches, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you." He whispered. He hadn't broken the skin, at least, but they still looked tender. 

Simon only smiled, covering John's hands with his own as he glanced back at him over his shoulder, "You didn't, it was actually pretty hot." He teased with a grin, twisting back slightly to press a kiss to his temple, "Get into bed, I'll be back in a minute." He promised him, gently stroking his fingers over the bone in John's wrist. 

He did what he was told, pulling the sheets back and sliding underneath them while Simon trailed into the bathroom. He returned a moment later, warm wash cloth in hand to clean them both up with. Good idea, since he remembered the unpleasantness of having to deal with the dried come the morning after they had first slept together. 

Once Simon had dealt with the wash cloth, he slid under the covers next to John, giving him a small smile, "I'm really glad that this happened." He said softly.

He could only smile, reaching out to tangle their fingers together, "Yeah, me too." He whispered, gently pressing a kiss to Simon's knuckles. Curled up with him here, it was easy to pretend that the outside world didn't exist, that the two of them were the only things that mattered. 

Tomorrow was a new day, but he was at least confident that everything would still be alright in the morning. 

He curled in close to him, dropping his arm around Simon's waist as he tucked his head into the crook of his neck, "Goodnight, Charley."

"Night, love." 

  
-x-

  
When he woke up the next morning, nothing seemed out of the ordinary at first. Hotel rooms were all the same, there was hardly any changes between his own room and Simon's - just as he was sure that there wouldn't be anything different about Nick's room either.

It was only when he shifted slightly and brushed against Simon's bare shoulder in his attempt to get comfortable did he remember that he wasn't alone in the bed, and that he wasn't in his own room at all. 

He squinted briefly against the light that was shining in through the blinds before turning to face Simon, and he smiled when he realised that the older man was still asleep. His face was slack with sleep, one hand curled in close against his chest, and the other folded underneath his pillow. The faint pillow crease across his cheek made for an even more endearing picture. 

Christ, but last night had been something else, alright. He was relieved to find though that the panic he'd felt when he'd woken up with Simon the first time was notably absent this time. Of course he'd promised Simon last night that he wouldn't push him away this morning - and he wouldn't have - but there had still been a tiny part of him that had expected him to freak out this morning. That was only natural though, or so he hoped anyway, considering Simon was the only man he'd ever slept with. 

Last night hadn't exactly been a quick fumble in the sheets either. The phrase _'making love'_ honestly made him cringe down to the bone, but he really couldn't think of a better phrase to describe last night. 

He liked to think of himself as a pretty decent sexual partner, but fuck.. Simon had been thorough and attentive, wholeheartedly focused on making it as pleasurable for him as possible. It had certainly been different though, for a multitude of reasons. Considering he'd never been with a man before last night, he'd never actually been on the receiving end when it came to sex, and he could admit that he was certainly feeling it now. It wasn't unbearable though, he was just a little sore. But like he'd said, Simon had known that, and he had been careful with him. 

He smiled as he watched Simon for a moment, reaching out to gently brush back a lock of blonde hair that had fallen across his forehead. He was used to constantly being aware of Simon's presence - his personality usually so loud and full of energy - and so it was certainly a change to see this soft, quiet side to him.

He was happy though, and this moment right here just reinforced the thoughts that he'd had when they were on stage last night - he could see himself falling so in love with Simon. 

Draping an arm around Simon's waist, he curled in close to him as he closed his eyes again. He wasn't sure exactly what time it was, but he could tell that it was early, and so he doubted that they'd be getting a call telling them to get up any time soon. Besides, he was warm and comfortable next to Simon, and so he was more than happy to curl back up with him for a couple of hours. 

He didn't really properly go back to sleep, but he was dozing by the time Simon stirred, his arm still wrapped around his waist. When he felt him moving though, he pulled back just far enough that he could look at him, giving him a small smile, "Good morning." 

Simon only grunted, reaching out to wind his arms around his neck and pull him back against him in a hug, "Too early." 

"It's not that early." He pointed out with a small smile, although he settled back against Simon without any resistance, dropping his arm back around his waist. It was nice to just lie here with him though, the bed warm and comfortable, and everything made slightly softer by the warm morning light coming through the blinds, "How did you sleep?" He asked, trailing his fingers gently up and down the ladder of Simon's ribs. 

"Like the dead." He mumbled, his voice slightly muffled by the way his face was pressed into John's hair, "Stop that.. tickles." 

He smiled as he just wrapped his arm around Simon instead, closing his eyes again, "You snore." He pointed out. 

"I do not snore." 

"Yes, you do. Bit inconsiderate, really, since I've been trying to sleep and everything."

He laughed when Simon playfully pulled his hair, not hard enough to actually hurt, but enough to get his point across. When he leaned back just far enough to look at him, Simon was smiling, his eyes soft in that 'I've just woken up' sort of way. Christ, but he was _beautiful._

"How are you feeling this morning?" Simon asked, trailing his fingers gently along the skin of his bare shoulder.

"A bit sore, but in a good way." He admitted, smiling as he closed his eyes and settled back down. He wasn't in pain, it was just a dull sort of ache that kept him aware of what they'd done last night. He could tell that Simon was still watching him, but he was content to lay here and bask in the attention for now. 

"I could get used to waking up like this." Simon spoke up again after a moment, reaching out to tuck a lock of his hair behind his ear. 

Honestly? He could get used to this too. He fucking hated sleeping alone, but even he could appreciate the fact that waking up next to somebody he cared about was far more preferable to waking up next to a hook-up from the night before. What he and Simon had.. he knew that it was the beginning of something good, and he was looking forward to seeing where this went from here. So he smiled, propping himself up on his elbows and folding his arms, "Yeah, so could I." He admitted with a small smile, ducking down to press a quick kiss to his lips. 

He settled back down then, although he raised an eyebrow at the thoughtful expression that Simon was currently wearing, "What?" He asked. He couldn't quite pinpoint what exactly that look meant, but he wasn't worried about it. He was pretty sure that if there was something wrong, Simon would have lead with that. 

"Nothing, it's just.. where did this change of heart come from?" Simon asked, a slight frown crossing his face as he propped his head up on his hand, "Not two weeks ago you wanted to forget that the whole thing had even happened, and now you seem so sure that this is what you want." 

He shrugged, running a hand through his hair, "I thought I wanted to forget about it, and then the more I thought about it, the more I realised that I'd been fucking stupid to think that." He explained, biting his lip gently. Simon's expression still didn't betray what he was thinking though, he looked as though he was just listening to him, "I didn't know how you felt about me then, but I had at least admitted to myself that the sex had been pretty great, and then I started noticing little things about you that I hadn't seen before." He said softly, "And then there was the day of that first show, when we weren't really speaking to each other. When we were on stage that night, I was so fucking jealous that you spent the whole night with Warren and would barely even look at me. Not just annoyed, either. _Jealous."_

Simon ducked his head then, biting his lip gently, "I'm sorry about that day. I was angry, and I did a shit job of handling it. I took it out on you when I shouldn't have." 

He reached out to brush his knuckles against the slope of Simon's cheekbone, smiling when he caught his eye, "I did a shit job of dealing with it too. It was on both of us." 

"Still." 

He swallowed, glancing back down at the space between them, "After you kissed me, and after I spoke to Roger, I had a long hard think about what I actually wanted. Knowing how you felt about me then, I thought about everything that had happened, and I asked myself if I could ever see myself falling in love with you." 

"And?" Simon asked, glancing back up at him. He looked unsure though, as though he wasn't quite sure that he wanted to hear the answer to that question. 

"Well, I'm here, aren't I?" He asked with a small smile. He wouldn't have been if he'd asked himself that question and then answer had been no. Considering the fact that Simon was one of his closest friends - plus the fact that they were in the band together, plus the fact that he knew Simon had had feelings for him for the last six years - he wouldn't have slept with him again if he hadn't meant it. He couldn't do that to him, "I'm just sorry it took me so long." 

"Don't apologise, I never planned on saying anything. I never planned on acting on it either, it was just.. one of those things. I never planned on having you find out about it." 

"Christ, Charley, how did you do it? Six bloody years, how did-" 

"Because I love you." Simon said, looking over at him, "I never thought that you'd want this, I never thought that you'd want me back. But you're my best friend, and I've always been in love with you, and that meant putting my feelings aside and doing what I thought was best for you. I thought that being friends and bandmates was as far as it would go, and I wasn't willing to jeopardise that by admitting how I really felt." 

Honestly, he was a little blindsided by that. He knew that Simon had had feelings for him, and he knew that he'd felt that way for years, but he hadn't for a moment thought that he was actually in love with him.

"You love me?" He asked, and he knew that his voice sounded small and shocked, but he really couldn't help it. 

"Of course I do, how could I not?" Simon asked, a small smile on his face. 

Rather than attempting to answer that, or to try and explain what it was that he was feeling, he simply leaned over to press their lips together in a hard kiss. He smiled as Simon wound his arms around his neck, pulling him down against him as he kissed him back. 

Fuck, but how had he not seen this coming? Even knowing that Simon had feelings for him, he'd never imagined that he was actually in love with him. He was glad that Simon didn't seem to be expecting him to say it back yet though, since he had only just come to terms with the fact that he wanted Simon at all - he knew it would have seemed like a bit of a cop out to tell him that he already loved him too. He did love Simon, there was no doubt about that, but he knew that it would take him a bit of time to admit that he was in love with him too.

He couldn't quite articulate how he felt - Simon had always been the one that was good with words - but he could at least attempt to show him how he felt.

He smoothed Simon's hair back from his face as he kissed him, moving himself over Simon so that he could straddle his hips with a knee either side of his body. Honestly, he knew they'd have to get up eventually, but he would have been happy to stay tangled up in the sheets with Simon all day, trading kisses and pretending that the outside world didn't exist, "I think you should let me repay the favour from last night." He whispered, teasing grin on his face as he brushed his lips against Simon's. 

Simon huffed out a soft breath of laughter, lightly flicking his tongue into John's mouth as he kissed him back. Pulling back, he reached up and gently brushed his thumb against the hickey he'd left on his collarbone last night, "Yeah, alright." He said murmured with a grin, briefly pressing his thumb down into the hickey. 

He closed his eyes, a spike of want shooting through him at the dull pain of the bruise when Simon pressed down on it. Alright, forget simply trading kisses, he wanted to stay here and fuck all morning.

He leaned down to press his mouth to Simon's neck, dragging his tongue over the dip in his throat as he rolled their hips together. That was as far as he got though, before the phone on the nightstand rang, and Simon turned his head to look over at the phone, "Leave it." He murmured, nudging his nose against Simon's neck. 

"It could be important."

"I'm sure it's not." 

"Just give me a minute." Simon told him, pressing a quick kiss to his lips before tipping him to the side so that he could slide out from underneath him to answer the phone, "Hello?"

While Simon spoke on the phone, he glanced around for his trousers from last night, finding them discarded over the side of the bed. He was pretty sure that he still had a couple of cigarettes in the box he'd been working his way through last night, and when he reached down to rummage through his pockets, he was relieved to find a few still in the box. So he just settled back on his own side of the bed, propped up against the pillow while he lit his cigarette. Lighting a second one, he passed it over to Simon once he had finished up on the phone.

"Thanks." Simon hummed as he took the cigarette, settling back against his own pillow, "That was Nick. He's complaining that you're not answering your phone, I think he's about ready to send out a search party." 

"I never answer my phone." He admitted with a small smile. He didn't have a problem when it was his home phone, but whenever they were staying in hotels, he tended not to answer the phone in his room. Back in the old days, they had communicated by shoving slips of paper underneath each others doors. 

"Yeah, I know that." Simon huffed, although he was smiling, "We're wanted downstairs for check out in half an hour. He told me to get you on my way down." 

Exhaling the smoke from his cigarette, he glanced over at Simon as he minced the words around in his head, "Are we going to keep this a secret from him? From the others?" He asked, biting his lip gently. He hadn't exactly thought about what they'd do in regards to everybody else. Obviously Nick didn't know he was here though - he probably assumed that he was either just not answering his phone, or that he had spent the night with some girl. 

"D'you want to keep it a secret?" Simon asked, looking over at him. 

"Not from Nick." He said, "As for everybody else.. we'll just see how things go, but I don't want to keep it from Nick." Well yeah, Nick was his closest friend, his oldest friend, and there were only the three of them left in the band. He didn't deserve to be kept in the dark over something like this. 

To his relief, Simon nodded, giving him a small smile as he reached over to take his free hand, "As if we could manage to keep something like this from him anyway." He pointed out, putting out the butt of his cigarette in the ashtray on the nightstand. 

"We might, if you could learn to keep your hands to yourself." He teased, putting out his own cigarette when Simon handed him the ashtray. 

"Well, that's not going to happen, so you might as well get used to it." Simon said with a grin as he draped himself over John, pressing an exaggerated kiss to his cheek. 

He wasn't surprised really, Simon had always been the most affectionate person he'd ever known - already prone to draping himself all over John, kissing him on the cheek when he wasn't expecting it, dropping his head onto his shoulder for a cuddle. He supposed that that was a good thing though, it meant they wouldn't arouse any suspicion by being affectionate with each other in public.

He smiled, playfully batting him away, although he didn't push him far. Honestly though, he wouldn't have changed anything about it for the world. He knew that some people tended to be a little put off by Simon's affectionate manner, saw him as clingy or over the top, but he'd never thought like that. It was just common practice between them to drape themselves all over each other. 

"I should probably go back to my room and get my shit together." He said after a moment, absentmindedly trailing his fingers along the shape of Simon's collarbone. He would have been happy to wait here, but he knew he shouldn't really show up downstairs in the same clothes that he'd been wearing last night. Plus, he'd sort of unpacked his bag all over his room yesterday when they had first checked in to their rooms, so he knew he needed to both repack his things and tidy up a little. He could probably use a quick shower while he was there too. 

Simon nodded, small smile on his face as he reached over to tuck a lock of hair behind his ear, "Yeah, I'll grab you on the way downstairs." 

It didn't take him long to grab his clothes from where they had been strewn across the room last night. As he buttoned his shirt though, he couldn't help but think of the last time, when he had barely managed to get himself dressed in his urgency to get out of the room. Shit, if they'd been in Simon's room rather than his own, he probably would have chanced running back to his own room in just his boxers - since he'd been so desperate to get out of there. Now, his pace was leisurely as he dragged himself out of bed and redressed. 

Simon walked him to the door once he had finished dressing, and he smiled as he quickly kissed him, "I'll see you in twenty minutes." He said with a small smile, before letting himself out. 

It only took him a minute or so to get back to his own room, and he sighed as he glanced around the room. His clothes were strewn across the bed, half of his things on the floor next to the bag. He unpacked like this every time, and every time, he swore he wouldn't do it the next time. 

He bit his lip gently as he contemplated the bag of coke in his toiletry bag, figuring that a small bump before he showered wouldn't hurt. He had managed to hold back last night, only going to far as having a couple of drinks in his attempt to remain mostly sober. Now though, he could feel the beginning of the itch underneath his skin. Besides, he was tired - last night starting to catch up with him - and so he figured that it would just wake him up a little. 

Pulling out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt once he had snorted the line, he shoved the rest of his things back into his bag with the intention of properly sorting it all out later, before heading into the bathroom for a quick shower. 

He stood in front of the mirror to brush his teeth and put his contacts back in once he was out of the shower, looking over his own reflection. He hadn't noticed before, but there was a line of soft bruises down the side of his neck, as well as a couple of darker ones along his collarbone and in the dip of his throat. He gently pressed down on the darkest one with his thumb - the same one that Simon had touched earlier - closing his eyes at the dull ache. Christ, but he'd had plenty of hickeys before in his lifetime, but he'd hardly ever found it quite as hot as this before. He knew that that had a lot to do with the fact that it was Simon who'd given them to him though. 

He was still a bit sore, but it certainly wasn't enough to have put him off the idea of sleeping with Simon again. If he was being honest, he wanted to take Simon straight back to bed once they had gotten back home. If they hadn't just been interrupted, he would have been more than happy to stay holed up in Simon's bed together for the rest of the day.

He quickly dressed in the jeans and t-shirt that he had already dug out of his bag, before going back out to finish packing his bag. He was in the process of zipping up his bag, sitting on top of it so that he could attempt to properly close it, when there was a knock on the door. 

Getting up to open the door, he smiled at Simon when he stepped back to let him in to the room, "Fancy meeting you here."

Simon only smiled and rolled his eyes in response, "You ready yet?" He asked, glancing past him to look at the half zipped up case. 

"Nearly, just trying to get this thing closed." He huffed, glancing at his bag. It had shut properly when he had packed it yesterday, but then again, he hadn't just shoved everything into it then. 

Rolling his eyes, Simon smiled as he stepped around him into the room, "You sit on it, I'll shut it." 

He did what he was told, planting himself down on top of the suitcase while Simon kneeled on the ground next to him so that he could zip it shut. He maybe needed to get a new one, the zip was a little janky on this one, which clearly wasn't helping the issue. Eventually, they got it closed though, and Simon huffed out a breath of laughter as he sat back on his heels, "I know for a fact that you have everything shoved in there arseways." 

"You wouldn't change me for the world." He teased as he draped his arms around Simon's neck, leaning down for a kiss. 

He let himself get lost in the kiss for a moment, savouring the feel of Simon's mouth moving against his, the softness of his hair as he ran his fingers through it. He could have stayed here forever, and he wondered why he had ever thought that this was something to lose his shit over. 

"I know Nick said downstairs in half an hour, how long d'you think we've got?" Simon asked, pulling back from the kiss just far enough to speak. 

"Not _nearly_ long enough for what I'd like to do to you." He breathed, grinning at the way Simon's breath hitched, before kissing him again. He pressed his body against Simon's when the older man wound his arms around his waist, his own arms still draped around his neck with one hand woven into his hair, "Come back to my flat later once you've left your stuff home. Stay the night, we can get take-away for dinner." He suggested as he gently brushed their noses together. There wouldn't be anybody to interrupt them there, they could spend the entire evening tangled together in the sheets. 

"Yeah, course. Don't have to ask me twice." Simon said with a small smile, "We should probably head downstairs, you know they'll only come and get us otherwise." 

"Yeah, you're right." He agreed. He knew he was right, and even though he had already said that he wanted to tell Nick about them, he knew that having him walk in on them with their tongues down each others throats probably wasn't the best way to go about it. 

He clambered to his feet, offering Simon a hand to help him to his own feet. 

They headed back down to the lobby together once he had grabbed the last of his things, and he couldn't help but smile as he watched Simon while the lift descended down to the ground floor. He looked soft and casual in a pair of jeans and a green jumper, hair mussed and free from any product. Of course he'd seen him like this before, but he'd never had the same sort of appreciation for it before now. 

"Y'know, it's very vain of you to wear that t-shirt." Simon teased as they walked out of the lift, each dragging their suitcase behind them. 

Looking down at himself, he smiled and rolled his eyes when he realised that he was wearing a Power Station t-shirt. He hadn't even realised, it was just the first t-shirt that he had pulled out of his bag when he'd gotten back to the room, "Comfy, though." He said with a grin, "I knew we'd be the first ones down here." 

"Yeah. Come on, let's wait over here." Simon suggested, leading him over to one of the small couches in the corner of the lobby, where they both sank down onto it. 

He sighed, closing his eyes as he draped his legs over Simon's lap. It was still early, but he knew that they were better off getting up and checking out earlier if they wanted to avoid the busier times at the hotel lobbies. He didn't mind usually, but they had been up pretty late last night, and he was feeling a little jittery. 

"You tired?"

He opened his eyes when he felt Simon rubbing his shin, giving him a small smile, "Yeah, got worn out last night." 

Simon laughed quietly, turning his attention to the hotel bar dinner menu, leaning forward slightly to pick it up off the coffee table, "That so? Worth it?" He asked with a grin, glancing over the menu. They wouldn't be sticking around long enough to grab dinner at the hotel bar, but whatever. 

"Yeah." He said with a nod, closing his eyes again as he dropped his head back against the back of the couch, "He was really fit." He smiled when he heard Simon laugh again, blindly reaching out to take his free hand and link their fingers together. 

It was nice to just sit here with him like this, Simon's hand warm in his own, the weight of Simon's other arm over his shins as he read through the menu. If he was being honest, the sooner they got on the road, the better. He'd be more than happy to catch a quick nap while they drove. 

"I take it this is why you weren't answering your phone this morning?"

He opened his eyes at the sound of Nick's voice, giving the younger man a small smile, "Yeah, wasn't in my room this morning. Or last night, for that matter." He admitted, biting his lip gently as he glanced up at Simon. He really hoped that Nick understood what he was getting at, and that he wouldn't have to just outright say that he'd spent last night having sex with Simon. He was sure it was pretty clear though, with the way he was draped over Simon's lap, and the hickeys very obviously visible on his neck. 

To his credit, Nick didn't let on what he was thinking, only nodding and raising an eyebrow in response, "Does this development mean that you two are done acting like children?" He asked after a moment, and John would have worried that he disapproved of the whole situation, had it not been obvious that Nick was trying to hold back his smile.

Simon obviously saw it too, as he huffed out a laugh, "Piss off, Bingo, I'm four years older than you." He said with a grin.

"I didn't say you were children, I said you were acting like children." Nick teased. 

"Oi, Simon, what was your room number?" Warren called over, from where he and Steve were up at the check out desk. 

Simon glanced back at them, before looking back to John and Nick, "On that note, I'll go give them a hand, and leave you two to talk." He said, pressing a kiss to the top of John's head as he stood, before trailing up to the other two at the front desk. 

He smiled as he watched him go, before turning his attention back to Nick. He couldn't help but think back to the last couple of times that the two of them had talked about himself and Simon. The first time, he had been incredibly hungover and panicking about the entire situation, then he'd just been angry that Simon was ignoring him. This time, he felt a whole lot better about all of it. 

"Well, this is new." Nick pointed out, although he was smiling, "What happened, I thought you two wanted to forget that the entire thing had even happened?" 

"Yeah, I thought so. Turns out that that wasn't what either of us actually wanted." 

"So are you two together now, or what's the situation?" 

"Yeah. Well, I think so. We haven't talked about that much yet, but I think we are, yeah. He loves me." He said with a small smile. He knew he couldn't really speak for Simon, but personally, he knew that he didn't particularly want to sleep with anybody else now that they had had this. With the fact that Simon had admitted to being in love with him though, he was pretty sure he could hazard a guess to say that he didn't intend on sleeping with other people either, but he knew that they should talk about it - just in case wires got crossed somewhere. 

Nick smiled at him, the expression soft and fond, "Are you happy?" He asked. 

"Yeah, I am." He admitted with a small smile, "Apart from you, he's my best friend, and I really think I can make him happy too." 

"Well, then I'm happy for you both." Nick said with a smile. 

That was all he wanted really, just for everybody they told to be okay with this news. It wouldn't have stopped them, he knew that much, but it would have added a bit of an awkward edge to things if they knew that Nick didn't approve of them being together. 

"Just, a couple of things." Nick started again after a moment, waiting for his nod before he continued, "One, no shagging in shared spaces. Two, I don't want to catch either of you in any compromising positions. Three, don't let it get in the way of the band." 

He nodded, pretending to think it over for a moment, "Well, I think those are all reasonable terms." He said with a grin. Alright, yeah, he'd take that much. He didn't plan on letting his and Simon's relationship affect the band at all, and so he'd take the term of no sex in areas that they'd be sharing with the others. 

"Too bloody right they're reasonable terms." Nick said with a laugh, tossing a bar mat from the table over at him. 

He smiled when he felt Simon running his fingers through his hair from behind, tipping his head back against the couch to look up at him, "Alright?" He said with a small smile. 

"Yeah, love, you two ready to go?" Simon asked, ducking down quickly to press a short kiss to his lips from upside down. 

"Honestly, I've known about this for five minutes and you're already unbearable to be around." Nick teased, laughing quietly, "I'm adding another term. No sickening displays of affection around the rest of us." 

"There's terms?" Simon asked with a grin, leaning over the back of the couch. 

"I'll explain later." He huffed, although he smiled as he playfully kicked at Nick's ankle.

He dragged himself up off the couch then, lingering back for a moment with Simon while Nick walked ahead to speak to Warren and Steve, "How did he take it?" Simon asked once Nick was out of earshot, biting his lip gently. 

"Good, he said he's fine with it once he doesn't catch us having sex." 

Simon laughed, the sound carefree and warm, and he smiled as he reached out to take his hand as they followed after the others. 

They could tell the other two another time, but he was glad that he had least told Nick what the situation was before he had a chance to accidentally find out. He was his best friend, they told each other things like this. He'd like Andy and Roger to know too, but that wasn't something that needed to happen right away. Hell, maybe they'd just eventually say fuck it and announce to the world that they were together. 

Like he'd said though, that wasn't something that they needed to think about right now. As they left the hotel together, hand in hand, he couldn't help but smile at the soft and content expression that Simon was currently wearing - and he quietly decided to himself that he'd happily spend the rest of his life making Simon smile like that. 

Plans and decisions could be made later. For now, he just wanted to go home with Simon and spend the rest of the day in a world of their own. 


End file.
